CONGRATULATIONS, TRACY JORDAN AND PHILIP MICHAEL THOMAS. YOU WIN:  This was in Lucy's handouts for Spanish class today:

WHAT CAN I DO TO GET THROUGH TO YOU?  No, I don't think the world needed a 2015 remix of "Say Say Say," though I do wonder if any here thought Macca's Tug of War and Pipes of Peace were worth revisiting at all.  (Also, really: why are you trying to hook up with your sister, Michael?)

STRAIGHT OUTTA KELTNER:  Your 15 finalists for Rock Hall of Fame this year are:

• Chicago
• Cheap Trick
• Deep Purple
• The Cars
• Janet Jackson 
• N.W.A. (3rd nomination)
• Nine Inch Nails (2nd nomination)
• Yes
• Chic (10th nomination)
• The JB's
• Chaka Khan
• Los Lobos
• Steve Miller
• The Smiths
• The Spinners

Who ya got? I suspect Janet Jackson is the only absolute lock in that bunch.

HIS LIFE GOT FLIPPED-TURNED UPSIDE DOWN: When did Will Smith stop being cool? "Because while it is essentially still impossible not to like Will Smith (he is SO good at being likable), it’s become easy to ignore him. And that’s VERY bizarre to think about, especially if you grew up during his arrival to stardom."

[We may have touched on this topic before.]

DEL FUEGO/KIDS MUSIC STAR/BIOGRAPHER IS A HECK OF A TRIPLE THREAT [UPDATED. IT'S HIS BROTHER. ONLY 2/3]: Dan  Warren Zanes has penned a new biography of Tom Petty, with his cooperation but not authorization. Big reveal: Petty was a heroin addict in the 1990s, and hopes telling his story will save others. Zanes on Petty:

Tom Petty has had too many hits for some critics to be fully comfortable with him. The old, art commerce divide where people go, “oh, it’s too commercial.” The other thing, I was just talking to somebody who was watching a live Tom Petty concert on a computer, no between-song banter. He didn’t ever get a trampoline out and do a backflip. No, he goes out and plays the songs that he wrote. That extends to interviews. He’s just not a self-promoter. He couldn’t go from music into politics, and Bruce Springsteen could. And that’s not a judgment on Bruce. There are times I wish that Petty was more of a self-promoter if only so that his songs could travel a little more widely. Because they’re so good.

Be It Resolved That: this blog remains fond of Tom Petty.

"DON'T LOOK UP":  Yes, rightly, Cubs 3B Kris Bryant should win NL Rookie of the Year, but 2nd place is certainly Matt Duffy.  Here's a great little essay Duffy wrote of his start in the bigs, and a lot of the attitude is not only why Giants fans love the guy, but also a bit about why Giants have done a good job of making sure their homegrown talent succeeds when they get to the Show.

PALPATINE '16: "[T]here are a number of serious problems with the Galactic Senate."

THE GREAT STATE OF CABLE:  The ABC Family channel will be known as "Freeform" starting in 2017 2016, which is as meaningless and stupid as SyFy or Spike or truTV, right?

“Freeform evokes the spirit and adventure of our audience," ABC Family/Freeform president Tom Ascheim said in a press release explaining the change. “Becomers represent a life stage rather than a generation,” and include both the younger end of the millennials as well as kids now in high school. Rather than keep focusing exclusively on millennials, the new Freeform will also aim to get their younger brothers and sisters to watch, since “in five years, millennials will be less than half of the [advertising] target,” the network says.... 

"The audience's identity and experience are fluid as they explore endless possibilities and their passions take shape.  Freeform personifies this fluidity and will deliver ideas, forms of content and ways of interacting with the brand."

Maybe I'm in a mood today, but what kind of nonsense word salad is that?

FOR FANS OF MUSTACHES AND GRIT:  The National Baseball Hall of Fame has released the names of the ten men to be considered by its Veterans Committee from the Pre-Integration Segregation Era this December.

On the other end of the timeline, Jonah Keri awards this year's hardware -- including a very difficult NL Cy Young race.

NONE OF WHICH FEATURE THE AUTHOR OF THE BOOKS WORD FREAK AND A FEW SECONDS OF PANIC:  Vulture picks "the one podcast to listen to" if you're looking for a great podcast in each of 24 genres.

FOR EVERYTHING THE NORTH GIVES, IT EXTRACTS A PRICE IN RETURN:  Just in time for the album's twentieth anniversary (remember the concert, Cosmos?), and possibly in celebration of noted Springteen fan Adam C's third straight ALOTT5MA FLB title, the AV Club's Ron Hart pens an appreciation of The Ghost of Tom Joad:

“The American story is transience and the idea of over the rise,” Springsteen told Costas in that 1995 interview. “Which is less now I suppose, but I think it’s an ingrained part of not just the American spirit but human spirit in general. My characters have always been on the move going someplace. Searching for something, whether its a better life or running from something or its the idea that moving might somehow make you better. It’ll heal you inside.”

#WHITEPEOPLEPROBLEMS:  Via the BoGlo:

Monday, [a] Harvard postdoc joined some like-minded aesthetes for a playful protest outside the Museum of Fine Arts. The rally, which mostly bewildered passersby, was organized by Max Geller, creator of the Instagram account Renoir Sucks at Painting, who wants the MFA to take its Renoirs off the walls and replace them with something better. Holding homemade signs reading “God Hates Renoir” and “Treacle Harms Society,” the protesters ate cheese pizza purchased by Geller, and chanted: “Put some fingers on those hands! Give us work by Paul Gauguin !” and “Other art is worth your while! Renoir paints a steaming pile!”

THAT'S GOOD EVEN BY MAVIS BEACON STANDARDS:  When 538 statistically analyzes the lyrical density of Hamilton, noting that it averages 144 words per minute (2.4 words a second), you'd better believe we'll link to it.  

BALLPARK DELICACIES DESK:  Among the special items offered at post-season Texas Rangers games: a one pound bag of Cheetos(R) sliced open and topped with brisket, sour cream, cheese, and jalapenos, and "a brownie that's rolled in Rice Krispie treats, dipped in funnel cake batter and fried."