Thursday, August 12, 2010

HEY, FRIENDLY'S? GAME ON: Not to be outdone by its Massachusetts-based rivals in the quest for extreme sandwiches, Denny's ("Now Serving Black People, Because The Courts Say We Have To") has introduced the "Fried Cheese Melt," a sandwich that combines four fried mozzarella sticks and melted American cheese, all grilled between two slices of sourdough bread.

No nutritional information is available yet. Added! CBS News: "The cost to your diet is 895 calories and 34 grams of fat."

13 comments:

  1. Daniel Fienberg8:05 PM

    Is it wrong that my only response to this is, "Can I order it with bacon?"

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  2. The Pathetic Earthling8:07 PM

    Have I relayed my 1993-era Titusville, FL Denny's wouldn't serve me and my friend because he was black so we decided to loudly argue about whether or not that was the case with him taking the position that Denny's would do no such thing and me taking the position that they would story?

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  3. bella wilfer8:18 PM

    This actually looks sort of delicious.  

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  4. spacewoman8:39 PM

    This just can't be as bad as the grilled-cheese-sandwich-as-hamburger-bun concoction. This is just having a grilled cheese sandwich and also a mozzarella sticks appetizer, except deliciouser.  Query: Do you dip it in marinara sauce?

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  5. Meghan9:06 PM

    No.  That would ruin the grilled cheese sandwich, which is the heart of the meal, really.

    Adam, I love your parenthetical nickname. 

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  6. calliekl9:10 PM

    Disagree. Marinara makes everything better (except heartburn).

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  7. Tosy and Cosh9:56 PM

    You know, Buffalo Wings, when you think about it, beat all of these attempts at super-fattening comfort foods. For what is a buffalo wing, but:

    The fattiest chicken part, in such small pieces that there is as much skin as meat (bake a wing by itself and it's still pretty un-healthy). . .

     . . . which is then deep fried . .

    . . . and doused in a sauce comprising primarily butter . . .

    . . . and dipped in copious amounts of a mayonaisse-based cheese sauce.

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  8. Anonymous10:36 PM

    Yes, but it's served with marianara instead of ranch, because, you know, ranch dressing is kind of unhealthy.

    --bd

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  9. Hey, Titusville, FL is in the same county I grew up in! I'm so proud. My only thought on this sandwich is that American and Mozzarella cheeses probably don't combine well.

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  10. Jenn.9:37 AM

    I'm a bit of a purist with my grilled cheese sandwiches, so this strikes me as wrong.  Every once in a while, you might be able to convince me to have a grilled cheese made with tomatoes inside, but otherwise, I just want cheese in between two slices of bread, grilled up with something buttery on the outside.

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  11. Genevieve12:19 PM

    Whoa. 
    I love when Adam uses that parenthetical for Denny's.  Partly because a former boss was the guy who did the Denny's case, and he's amazing; partly because I forget about it from time to time and am glad to be reminded of how sleazy and horrible they are, so I won't eat there.

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  12. TPE:  If you have, could you repeat it in detail?  Sounds like a great story.

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  13. The Pathetic Earthling4:26 PM

    Tina - there's actually not much to it, but briefly:  June 21 1993, my oldest friend - a fairly dark-skinned black man - has flown out to help me move back from Washington DC to California.  In my last officlal act working on the Hill, I scam some VIP tickets out of NASA (well, a scam in the sense that I tell them exactly who I am and what I want but that I probably don't merit them) for a space shuttle launch.  My friend and I drive all night - see the launch - and then decide to hit Titusville FL denny's after learning that, one can get a BigMac anywhere in the world, one cannot get one before 10:30 am.  In any event, off we go to Denny's -- this is right after the whole news blowout about the black secret service agents -- and while we get seated quickly, we are systematically ignore by the waitresses.  Now, we're tired and punch drunk from having driven all night, so we start discussing, at an increasing volume, the allegations against Denny's.  I take the "look at what these people did to black people, they don't serve them." and my friend playing with pure increduluity, that Denny's would do no such thing.  As waitresses pass us, and our area gets more and more uncomfortable, my friend says that there is no way Denny's would ignore a black man.  Petty racism is a thing of the past after all.  Eventually, a red-faced manager shows up with coffee, more or less assigns us a waitress full-time and comps us our breakfast which came out in about 30 seconds.  The implication though was never to patronize that establishment again.  

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