A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago

SERIOUSLY, SOMEONE NEEDS TO EMBARASS DAVID BELL ON NATIONAL TV: ALOTT5MA fave Bobby Abreu just won the Home Run Derby with a stunning display of left-handed power. Ever since his early season distractions, he's been playing some pretty inspired baseball.

In his honor, a flashback to the Score Bard:

"What's great about Bobby Abreu,"
Says Bowa, "He'll never dismeu.
He just gives his best
And will not protest,
Whatever you ask, he'll obeu."

Also via the Bard, your wacky sports injury of the week: this one's pretty grape.