A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago

SPICE UP YOUR MIDLIFE: After more or less a non-stop saturation-marketing campaign, my interest in the Spice Girls reunion tour is cresting at exactly "none at all." It's not as if I hate them (or at least the four of them who aren't encouraging Tom Cruise); I just don't see why anybody at all would care. Anyway, in honor of this momentous occasion, I thought I'd resurrect one of the oldest jokes in the world and relay their post-pubescent stage names:

• 3% Original Biomatter Content Spice
  
• Litigiously Knocked Up Spice
  
• UK Office Dawn Spice
  
• Looks 10 Times Better Without the Union Jack Dress and the Clown Makeup and I’m Not Just Saying That in Fear of her Apparently-Computer-Generated Personal Trainer Spice
  
• Used to Be a Wild Party Girl Then Settled Down and Married a Commodities Trader and Now Has Opinions on Double-Strollers Spice

Is there really a demand for this?