Friday, January 25, 2013

I HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT THE MAJOR PART OF THE WORK OF A PRESIDENT IS TO INCREASE THE GATE RECEIPTS OF EXPOSITIONS AND FAIRS AND BRING TOURISTS TO TOWN: The Washington Nationals will announce tomorrow that William Howard Taft ("Bill"/"Big Chief") will join the Rushmore Four of George, Tom, Abe, and Teddy as the newest Racing President. Not Kennedy, not Reagan, not Van Buren, not Bartlet. Damn.

10 comments:

  1. If they love me, they'll have him race while wearing a bathtub.

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  2. That's an excellent point.

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  3. So he anticipated the most positive rule change in baseball history, outside of making sure the balls are white?

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  4. Watts7:43 PM

    C'mon - you get stuck in your tub on the morning of your inauguration? You kind of just have to take that ribbing for the rest of eternity.

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  5. Urban legend. The tub cracked when it was being moved so they took the opportunity to put in a larger one in the White House.

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  6. Watts7:58 PM

    Excuse me, do you think I didn't do my homework?
    http://books.google.com/books?id=cVrxbeRmlqgC&pg=PA24#v=onepage&q&f=false

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  7. DO NOT TEST THE LIBRARIAN.

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  8. Not sourced in the book though.

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  9. Watts7:36 PM

    Not my problem. At a certain point, you just have to trust the Harvard-educated, well-respected historian: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Chace

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  10. Surely we're not going to let the current unavailability of reliable sworn eyewitness from the Taft administration get in the way of a story this good?

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