Friday, July 27, 2012

A FARM ANIMAL IS DOING SOMETHING ... UNPLANNED:  BroBible, GQ UK, BBB, and no doubt other sites are starting to form rules for an London Olympics Opening Ceremonies Drinking Game for this evening.  We can do better.

  • Michael Phelps' mom is shown.
  • An American athlete is highlighted who doesn't play basketball, gymnastics, track (they're not talking to field), swimming, or beach volleyball.
  • A non-US, non-basketball athlete is highlighted by NBC (2)
  • Pompous "Olympic ideals" bullshit from Rogge.
  • Costas makes some reference to the tension when Iran and Iraq follow each other in procession, as well as Ireland's serving as a buffer between those two and Israel.
  • A Python, Steve Coogan, or the AbFab ladies.
  • Her Majesty is dour (1), politely smiling (2), authentically happy (chug).
  • Princesses Eugenie or Beatrice are seen, double if wearing hats.
  • Correctly predicting a nation whose initial entry during the Parade of Nations is bumped by NBC for a commercial.
  • Costas references, in any way, the 1904 St. Louis Olympics (chug).
  • Full male frontal nudity, like they had in the 2004 Athens opening ceremony.


  1. isaac_spaceman11:25 AM

    I have a pretty great Olympic drinking game. Let's see if you can follow the rules: 

    1.  Drink if you feel like taking a drink.
    2.  Drink twice or more every time you want to get drunk.
    3.  Stop drinking completely if you are under 21, are driving, or are too old for this shit.

  2. Fred App12:18 PM

    The advance word I've received from people who have seen the rehearsals is ... it's interesting, but there are parts that drag quite a bit, and the overall ceremony seems longer than traditional. So maybe the drinking game should be: "If you're bored, do a shot."

    It's public knowledge at this point that McCartney is performing at the end. I'm holding out hope that he stops his performance and calls out all his British Invasion compatriots: Jagger, Richards, Clapton, Townshend, Daltrey, etc. I'm sure there's no chance of that happening. But it would be awesome if it did.

  3. Ringo?  Julian and Dhani?

  4. You can forget about that Robert Venturi Retires appreciation piece now. 

  5. Christy in Philly2:12 PM

    I'd be surprised if Michael Phelps' mom is shown. He's swimming at 10 AM on Saturday and not participating tonight.

  6. fred app2:52 PM

    So far, as we wait for the actual ceremonies to begin, we have groups of people parading around the track like it was the Macys Thanksgiving parade, carrying ballons that look like clouds. Plus, they're passing out 3-5 glasses. And now here come the animals! I think that means it's time for me to drink.

  7. fred app3:01 PM

    That should be 3D glasses, by the way.

  8. Randy3:01 PM

    One drink if Oscar Pistorius is shown.  Two drinks if the controversy of his "unfair advantage" is discussed.

  9. Joseph Finn3:03 PM

    Do a chug if Costas refers to them properly as the 1904 Chicago Olympics, "then stolen by St. Louis."

  10. Duvall4:02 PM

    An American athlete is highlighted who doesn't play basketball, gymnastics, track (they're not talking to field), swimming, or beach volleyball.

    Could be dangerous with the USWNT in play.

  11. Roger4:12 PM

    John's reanimated corpse?

  12. Yeah.  Forgot about Solo, Wambach, and Mitts.  Also, tennis players in general.  Sharapova's a flag bearer.

  13. Never mind; USWNT stayed in Glasgow.

  14. bill.6:46 PM

    If "Olympic spirit" is mentioned, switch to hard clear spirits. Already drinking that? Light it on fire and slam it.

  15. Eric J.8:42 PM

  16. lisased10:48 PM

    We are dirnking whenever we are inspired to say, "Shut up, Costas" or "Shut it, Lauer."

  17. Joseph J. Finn12:54 AM

    And that is why we're now posting from beyond the grave.