PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD: In case you missed it, Isaac's essay of Black Sabbath's merits for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame gradually veered into a discussion of whether Bill James' "Keltner List" could be modified for such purposes, and, if so, how 2005 nominees The O'Jays would fare. Loyal reader and resident musicologist Bob Elwood took up the challenge:

Adam had suggested that I analyze whether the O’Jays belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame using the so-called “Keltner” list, which is usually used to evaluate whether a given baseball player belongs in the Baseball Hall of Fame. The “Keltner” list was developed by famous baseball analyst Bill James in his 1985 Bill James Baseball Abstract. Adam was kind enough to adapt the questions on the list so they make more sense for a musical artist.

1. Were the O’Jays ever regarded as the best band in pop music? Did anybody, while they were active, ever suggest that the O’Jays were the best band in pop music?

I think you have to answer this one no. Then again, we might want to ask Justin Timberlake for his opinion.

2. Were the O’Jays ever the best band in pop music in their genre?

An intriguing question. From 1972 through 1989, the O’Jays put together a string of ten songs that went to #1 on the R&B charts, five of which hit the top 10 on the Billboard charts. Four of these hits are masterpieces that have truly stood the test of time: “Backstabbers” (#1, R&B, #3 pop, 1972), “Love Train” (#1 R&B, #1 pop, 1973), “For the Love of Money” (#3 R&B, #9 pop, 1974), and “I Love Music” (#1 R&B, #5 pop, 1975).

Let’s stipulate that the relevant genre is 1970’s soul music, prior to disco. Are there other solid contenders to claiming the top spot in that genre? The Spinners had only 6 #1 songs on the R&B charts. Although they had more songs hit the pop charts than the O’Jays did, both groups had the same number of top ten pop hits. More importantly, I think the O’Jays have stood the test of time better than the Spinners.

The Stylistics? Betcha by golly, no.

The Delfonics? They didn’t blow my mind this time.

The Isley Brothers? This old heart of mine just isn’t going to pick them over the O’Jays. Anyway, the Isleys are already in the Hall.

The Chi-Lites? Have you seen them? Tell me have you see them?

Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes? Bad luck, that’s what they got, that’s what they got.

The Manhattans? Let’s just kiss and say no way.

The Average White Band? Go ahead and cut the cake, but the O’Jays were better.

The Staple Singers are another strong challenger. Frankly, I’d take the opening of “I’ll Take You There” over any segment of the O’Jays music. But I’ll give the nod to the men from Canton, Ohio on the basis of their entire body of work. By the way, the Staple Singers are already in the Hall.

Three solo artists are clearly superior to the O’Jays in this genre. All three are already in the Hall of Fame and two of them are generally considered geniuses: James Brown, Stevie Wonder, and Al Green.

So I guess I would say that if we limit this question to bands, we can answer yes, but if we include solo artists, the O’Jays rank fourth.

3. Did the O’Jays have an impact on a number of other bands?

The O’Jays were one of the earliest and most successful of the “Philly sound” bands. The “Philly sound” clearly had a huge impact on many other bands. But most people give credit for the success of that sound to the various producers, writers, and arrangers, notably Kenny Gamble, Leon Huff, Gene McFadden, John Whitehead, and Thom Bell. This is a chicken and egg problem. I am inclined to say that the O’Jays had an important impact on other bands, but not a profound one.

Do we get to count Gerald Levert’s success here? I need “closure.”

4. Were the O’Jays good enough that they could play regularly after passing their prime?

The O’Jays formed in 1958, nearly 50 years ago. Their first hit was in 1963 and their most recent hit was just last year (2004’s “Make Up”, which hit #74). They had #1 hits spanning a 17-year period. They deserve a yes on #4.

5. Are the O’Jays the very best band in history that is not in the Hall of
Fame?

I don’t have the energy to do this systematically, but, much as I love the O’Jays, I doubt that they are the very best band in history that is not in the Hall. Not sure who I would place ahead of them, though.

6 Are most bands who have comparable records in the Hall of Fame?

I more or less covered this in #2 and I think you would have to say yes on this question.

7. Do the band's records meet Hall of Fame standards?

I bet that the average inductee had more Top 40 Billboard hits than the O’Jays had, but the O’Jays are in the right ballpark. The O’Jays clearly had more Top 40 hits than many inductees.

8. Is there any evidence to suggest that the band was significantly better or worse than is suggested by its records?

Well, there was that period when Eddie Levert lost three full seasons because he was in the Air Force during the Korean war (joke).

9. Is it the best band in its genre who is eligible for the Hall of Fame?

Yes. See #2.

10. How many #1 singles/gold records did the O’Jays have? Did they ever win a Grammy award? If not, how many times were the O’Jays nominated?

One song hit #1 on the Billboard charts.

Ten songs hit #1 on the R&B charts. Six gold singles. One album hit #1 on the pop album charts. Four albums hit #1 on the so-called “black charts.” At least four gold albums. Not a single damned Grammy award (not sure if they were ever nominated).

11. How many Grammy-level songs/albums did the O’Jays have? How many Rolling Stone covers did they appear on? Did most of the bands who played in this many Rolling Stone covers go into the Hall of Fame?

Let’s just say that I believe that artists in the O’Jays genre are under-represented on Rolling Stone covers.

12. If this band was the best band at a concert, would it be likely that the concert would rock?

Hell, yeah! They are a wicked good band in concert.

13. What impact did the band have on rock history? Was it responsible for any stylistic changes? Did it introduce any new equipment? Did it change history in any way?

See # 2. I don’t think we can really say much on this subject.

14. Did the band uphold the standards of sportsmanship and character that the Hall of Fame, in its written guidelines, instructs us to consider?

No major scandals as far as I know. During one concert, I saw Eddie Levert invite an attractive woman in the audience to participate in some “affectionate” behavior with him. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Conclusion: The O’Jays deserve positive answers on nearly all of the “Keltner” list questions. INDUCT.

And, indeed, they were inducted this year.

If you have a band you'd like to run the Keltner List on, email it to me. Any suggestions for further modifications of the List? Bring it on.

RACE RERUN; LOST LOST: If, like the Spacehold, you TiVo both Amazing Race and Lost, giving the former preference on your to-do list, then remember to override your preferences (assuming you would rather have a new Lost than a clip-show Race). The two conflict tomorrow. if you don't, the title of this post will summarize your "now playing" list on Thursday morning.

SHOW YOUR TEATS? Watching this week's Amazing Race, I was reminded -- as were you, I'm sure -- of this weekend's episode of This American Life, which highlighted the work of Dr. John Gottman in determing what makes long-term relationships work.

In short -- if you missed the show and haven't read Blink yet (and, Sideshow Malcolm, you've stolen my look) -- Gottman sits down couples and asks them to speak, for fifteen minutes, about a topic on which they disagree. After those 15 minutes, he can determine with an 85% accuracy rate whether that couple will stay together for five years. Turns out, it isn't what couples argue about that matters, or how often they argue, but how they argue: couples that demonstrate defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and especially contempt for each other during their fights aren't likely to last. (And those that can still laugh while they're in trouble, and listen to each other's grievances and respond? More likely to end up okay.)

Ron and Kelly, I'm looking at you.

[remainder of conversation moved to the Comments on Matt's post, since he got here first.]

RACE JUDICATA: Tonight's Race generates questions--is there a limit to producers' generosity when it comes to new vehicles? Was the penalties imposed on two teams appropriate and necessary in light of the circumstance? Aside from that penalty and the repeated breakdowns that a team suffered, we're left with a generally "meh" hour aside from the last team to arrive going out with dignity and some clever strategy from a team concerned about the impact of a non-elimination leg. Discuss. (And, yeah, I've been waiting for a chance to use that title.)

THIS ISN'T A GOOD MONTH TO BE A FAMOUS PERSON: Saul Bellow, the Nobel Prize-winning Jewish novelist most famous to Gen X'ers for having once been used as a ruse to lure Rabbi Herschel Krustofsky to a lunch at Izzy's Deli with his son, has passed away at the age of 89.

Said Philip Roth, no slouch himself, "The backbone of 20th-century American literature has been provided by two novelists — William Faulkner and Saul Bellow. Together they are the Melville, Hawthorne, and Twain of the 20th century."

At his Nobel lecture in 1976, Bellow concluded:

The essence of our real condition, the complexity, the confusion, the pain of it is shown to us in glimpses, in what Proust and Tolstoy thought of as "true impressions". This essence reveals, and then conceals itself. When it goes away it leaves us again in doubt. But we never seem to lose our connection with the depths from which these glimpses come. The sense of our real powers, powers we seem to derive from the universe itself, also comes and goes. We are reluctant to talk about this because there is nothing we can prove, because our language is inadequate and because few people are willing to risk talking about it. They would have to say, "There is a spirit" and that is taboo. So almost everyone keeps quiet about it, although almost everyone is aware of it.

The value of literature lies in these intermittent "true impressions". A novel moves back and forth between the world of objects, of actions, of appearances, and that other world from which these "true impressions" come and which moves us to believe that the good we hang onto so tenaciously - in the face of evil, so obstinately - is no illusion.

No one who has spent years in the writing of novels can be unaware of this. The novel can't be compared to the epic, or to the monuments of poetic drama. But it is the best we can do just now. It is a sort of latter-day lean-to, a hovel in which the spirit takes shelter. A novel is balanced between a few true impressions and the multitude of false ones that make up most of what we call life. It tells us that for every human being there is a diversity of existences, that the single existence is itself an illusion in part, that these many existences signify something, tend to something, fulfill something; it promises us meaning, harmony and even justice. What Conrad said was true, art attempts to find in the universe, in matter as well as in the facts of life, what is fundamental, enduring, essential.

For those of us who want to start reading Bellow, where should we start?

...AND KEVIN BACON PLAYED A BASKETBALL COACH IN THE AIR UP THERE: The Minnesota River snakes past the town of Mankato, Minnesota, taking a northeast turn there and heading toward the Twin Cities where it joins up with the Mississippi, which of course flows south eventually reaching St. Louis, site of last night's NCAA men's basketball championship game.

The reason for the quick geography lesson is to illustrate how the ripples of a single coaching change in college basketball can set off a twisting, turning river of moves. In this case the path that starts with the victorious Roy Williams at University of North Carolina leads all the way back up the river to Mankato.

Williams got the Carolina job after Matt Doherty was fired, leaving Kansas University. Kansas then hired Bill Self away from the University of Illinois. The Illini grabbed Bruce Weber from Southern Illinois University. SIU promoted Weber's top assistant, Matt Painter, to the head job and then lured Paul Lusk, the head coach at the University of Dubuque, to fill Painter's position*. Dubuque hired Marty McDermott away from Lake Superior State, which then promoted assistant Mike Fitzner to the head job. To fill Fitzner's spot, LSS hired Brady Larson, who was a graduate assistant at the Minnesota State-Mankato. The trail ends with Austin Hansen, a former sharpshooter from South Dakota State University, who moved into coaching as the graduate assistant at Mankato.

It turns out that Mankato, which is the Dakota Indian word for greenish blue earth, turns out to be not that many shades away from Tar Heel Blue.

VAUGHN MEADER, SLIGHTED AGAIN: The Library of Congress today announced this year's 50 inductees into the National Recording Registry--a class led (in the music category) by the Beach Boys' "Pet Sounds," the score to "Star Wars," Public Enemy's "Fear of A Black Planet," and Nirvana's "Nevermind." Prior inductees include Woody Guthrie's "This Land Is Your Land," Ray Charles' "What'd I Say," "Sgt. Peppers'," Marvin Gaye's "What's Goin' On?," Carole King's "Tapestry," Springsteen's "Born to Run," and Grandmaster Flash's "The Message." The Registry also includes sound recordings of speeches by Neil Armstrong, Woodrow Wilson, FDR, and William Jennings Bryan. Then, there are oddities like "The Jesse Walter Fewkes field recordings of the Passamaquoddy Indians," the "Okeh Laughing Record," premiere broadcasts of "The Grand Ole Opry" and "A Prarie Home Companion," and "Recordings of Asian elephants by Katharine Payne." Reading the items that are in is worth a few minutes of your time.