MAYBE THIS TIME, MIA FARROW AND PHILIP ROTH WILL WATCH IT TOGETHER:  Not that we like to tell you how to spend your leisure time, but Sharknado 2: The Second One debuts on Syfy at 9pm tonight.

YOU F----D UP.  YOU TRUSTED US:  What happens when you invite a real diplomat to help you play Diplomacy?  David Hill, a boardgame enthusiast, decided to dust off his game of Diplomacy invited Dennis Ross, a career foreign service negotiator, to serve as his coach.

Follow the story in two related pieces of media: the Grantland article and last week's episode of This American Life.

DAMN HOOVER:  The FBI will be moving out of DC's ugliest office building, and is looking at new spaces in Greenbelt, Landover, and Springfield.

ALOTT5MA FRIDAY GRAMMAR RODEO MONDAY COLUMN OF MILK EDITION:  There's apparently a grammatical error on Greg Maddux's HOF plaque. It credits him for being the only pitcher in MLB history with "300 wins, 3,000 strikeouts and less than 1,000 walks," but shouldn't it be fewer than 1,000 walks?  [Also: Oxford comma fail.]

IT'S NOT A GREAT SIGN WHEN YOUR BEER IS CUSTOMARILY SERVED WITH A LIME TO HIDE THE FLAVOR: Deadspin lists eighteen overrated beers.

TO THE MOON:  The NYT's Neil Genzlinger makes the shocking discovery that most "classic" tv just isn't very watchable anymore: "Sluggish pacing, wooden acting, wince-inducing jokes and obvious plot twists abound in the television of the distant and even not-so-distant past. Too much of this will turn your brain to mush as surely as too much of today’s reality TV will."

DR. D PLAINLY WAS A PART OF DHARMA:  Damon Lindelof has written a Lost-themed episode of Phineas and Ferb, which will air in the fall.