A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago

UP NEXT: THE RETURN OF THE RETURN OF BRUNO? In an A.V. Club interview, former child actor Wil Wheaton keeps us up to date on the whereabouts of beloved late-80s rapper Chunky A:

O: The Internet Movie Database says that you dropped some science on "Dope, The Big Lie," from the Chunky A album. How did you hook up with Chunky A, and what has he been up to since then?

WW: As far as I know, Chunky A retired to Jamaica. Sadly, he went into a diabetic coma, and he actually lives on a cargo plane that never lands for more than 25 minutes to refuel. He's really a man without a country, which is unfortunate. Of course, Chunky A's good friend Arsenio Hall hooked me up with that whole situation. At the time, Paramount was doing The Arsenio Hall Show, and Star Trek was owned by Paramount, so they had me do promotional things with Arsenio Hall, and they put me on the Chunky A album. It's funny, because while I've never used drugs—it's not my thing—I've always been opposed to the war on drugs and the drug laws. They're terrible, and they don't work. I've always favored treatment and decriminalization over the way our country does things now. It's funny to me that I'm on this album where I'm like, "Drugs are bad, yo!" I don't remember what I said.

O: You don't have the lyrics to "Dope, The Big Lie" memorized?

WW: No, no, I don't. I wrote them on my hand with a Sharpie and they all kind of ran together. Everybody thinks I'm scatting, when I'm really just trying to read them off my hand.

O: What is Chunky A like?

WW: He's a very private person. He's really not what you'd expect. You go over and see him and expect him to be kind of larger than life, literally, and he's not. Remember the guy Hambone, who lived in his house, and he hadn't been outside in a long time because he couldn't move out of his bed because he was so large? He was sort of like the Slurm-mother monster from Futurama. Chunky A was headed in that direction. We all had an intervention where we tried to help him out. But unless you're willing to help yourself, those around you can only do so much. He was large of heart and large of waist, and he was always willing to finish whatever was on your plate.