Thursday, April 1, 2004

WHEN DEMOCRACY FAILS: Our Good Friend Charlie Glassenberg often said to me that democracy was best suited for talent shows and beauty pageants, but that you couldn't trust The People for anything beyond that.

After last night's American Idol results show, I'm willing to limit it to beauty pageants. My top-of-the-head list of Worst AI Voting Results Travesties?
5. Vanessa Olivarez as first AI2 bootee.

4. Briana Ramirez-Rial fails to advance from AI3 semifinal group and not invited to wild card show.

3. Josh Gracin survives; Trenyce goes home in AI2.

2. Nikki McKibbin outlasts Tamyra Gray in AI1.

1. Last night, Amy Adams eliminated in AI3 with La Toya London and Jennifer Hudson on chopping block; neither Conan O'Sinatra or Pencil Boy are even in bottom three, despite ghastly performances.

Look out, people: the ClayNation has realized its power to protect dorky white boys, and we all will suffer if they are allowed to prevail.

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