A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago

THEY CAN HAVE OPRAH WINFREY WHEN THEY PRY HER FROM OUR COLD DEAD FINGERS: Russell Crowe reports that he was the subject of an al-Qaeda kidnapping plot in 2001:

In an interview published in the March edition of Australia's GQ magazine, Crowe said FBI agents told him of the threat in 2001, in the months before he won a best actor Oscar for his role as Maximus in "Gladiator."

"That was the first (time) I'd ever heard the phrase 'al-Qaida,'" Crowe said. "It was about — and here's another little touch of irony — taking iconographic Americans out of the picture as sort of a cultural destabilization plot," he added.

Certainly, French culture would collapse without the keystone strength of Gerard Deparideu. But this threat leads the Pathetic Earthling to ask: what icon's absence would most destablize American culture? Brad Pitt? Gene Hackman? Abe Vagoda? Show all work.