A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago

YEAH, BUT HE PUT PEANUT BUTTER IN MY CHOCOLATE: It's not that the local Spokane paper reported on an Ookie Brownie prank that amuses me. It's that they decided to talk to an expert about the health implications:

Panhandle Health Spokeswoman Susan Cuff said the chance of the students’ health being affected would be “extremely remote.”

“Semen wouldn’t survive the stomach acids and digestion process,” Cuff said. “Anything that’s in it would not survive being out of the body for any period of time.”

Cuff said the only possible concern could be the spread of Hepatitis B, but for students to contract the disease, she said the semen would have had to come into contact with an open and bleeding sore.

Kids, let this be a lesson: do your own baking. (Via ObscureStore.)