THOUGH I DON'T ACTUALLY NEED ONE, I DO APPRECIATE HAVING A WEATHERMAN INFORM ME WHICH WAY THIS PARTICULAR WIND BLOWS: According to the Captivate Network (motto: "America's Fastest-Growing Source of Non-Consensual News Dissemination, Having Recently Surpassed Lower-Back Tattoos"), today's weather forecast in California is "Deadly Heat and Misery." I'll leave aside, for the moment, the notion that we equate "misery" with "10 degrees outside the hump of the bell curve" (after all, I live in a state where "rain causes large puddle at the corner of Ventura and Sepulveda" beats out primary election results on the local news, and no, I'm not kidding). I just like the fact that my weather forecast is now giving me information about my corresponding mental state.

So what's in your meteorological future? A low-pressure zone accompanied by high-pressure anxiety? Partly sunny with a hazy sense of entitlement?

THE BEAUTY OF THIS LIST IS MOST OF THESE CDs CAN BE BOUGHT FOR UNDER $7.00 AT SPUN.COM: UGO lists the top 50 albums of our time (which is apparently since 1990). I'm not saying this is a boring list (well, yes I am), but I'm betting a lot of these CDs are still in the box from the last time you moved. And good lord, please don't read the tortured explanations of why these albums deserve praise.

WHAT IS THE SOUND OF 40 MILLION PEOPLE NOT CARING? In news shocking...well..pretty much nobody, former member of N'Sync Lance Bass has managed to get the cover of People by announcing that he's gay. Also of interest is that Bass officially confirms that he is in a "very stable" relationship with TAR winner Reichen Lehmkuhl.

I'M A COMEDIAN DOING COMIC FILMS WITH THIS BLEAK VIEW ALL THE TIME, AND EITHER THAT'S WHAT MAKES MY MOVIES INTERESTING OR IT'S WHAT TORPEDOES THEM: The WaPo's David Segal sits down with Woody Allen in advance of the release of Scoop, who has much to say about his filmmaking:

"I never wanted movies to be an end. I wanted them to be a means so that I could have a decent life -- meet attractive women, go out on dates, live decently. Not opulently, but with some security. I feel the same way now. A guy like Spielberg will go live in the desert to make a movie, or Scorsese will make a picture in India and set up camp and live there for four months. I mean, for me, if I'm not shooting in my neighborhood, it's annoying. I have no commitment to my work in that sense. No dedication."

"Kubrick was a great artist. I say this all the time and people think I'm being facetious. I'm not. Kubrick was a guy who obsessed over details and did 100 takes, and you know, I don't feel that way. If I'm shooting a film and it's 6 o'clock at night and I've got a take, and I think I might be able to get a better take if I stayed, but the Knicks tipoff is at 7:30, then that's it. The crews love working on my movies because they know they'll be home by 6."

Segal makes with this observation, upon which you might want to comment: "If Allen lives another couple decades and works half as hard, he could easily make another dozen movies. But if he stops tomorrow, he'll have created a filmography that has no precedent. With the possible exception of Charlie Chaplin, nobody has ever directed, written and acted in as many standout movies as Woody Allen, and he did it without anyone else, except for an occasional co-writer, vetting his lines."

I CAN'T SEE YOU EVERY NIGHT, FREE: RockStar: Is His First Name Actually Gilbert? was another fun show last night, with the potential winners (Dilana, Storm, Toby and Lukas) further separating themselves from the folks who just don't belong there because they're not dirty-angry-f'ed up enough to be rawkers -- Patrice, Josh, Phil and Dana, the last of whom still looks like she's Katharine McPhee playing dress-up in the grunge shop. And Josh? If you're constantly being criticized for being too "soft", don't come out with "No Rain", y'know?

Also, it's pretty clear to me that both Jason Newsted and Gilby Clarke are in the running for the ALOTT5MA Award for best reality tv judge/critic, because Tim Gunn can't win it every year.

WHO WANTS TO GET A STATUETTE FROM RACHEL WEISZ? One thing worth noting--we're already halfway through the year, and has there really been a single legitimate Oscar contender yet? Sure, we've got some solid competitors in minor categories (odds are, we've seen our three nominees for Best Animated Feature already, probably several of the nominees for Best Documentary Feature, and some Special Effects contenders), and one or two potential top category nominees (Streep in Devil Wears Prada leading the way). Anything you want to submit for consideration? I'll offer two:

• Garrison Keillor, Best Original Screenplay, A Prarie Home Companion. Sure, the story (to the extent there is a story) doesn't make a whole lot of sense, and there's a touch of egomania in the film, but the little character moments and the seamless integration of the real and the fictional are solid. While no single one of the performances is a standout, the ensemble is excellent.
• "I Need To Wake Up," Performed by Melissa Etheridge, Best Original Song, from An Inconvenient Truth. I found the movie itself (though it's a likely winner for Documentary Feature) a bit preachy and overly obvious, but the song is among Etheridge's best--starting off slow and moving into a driving chorus off a simple riff.

YOUR COMPUTER. YOUR BRAIN. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? Yes. Yes, kids. Kiss that qwerty goodbye. Set your joystick aside and consign your trackball to the dustbin of history. Get ready to step into the interface environment of the future with hardware that plugs right into your brain (hearteningly, for the adware/TIA-types, it sounds like they won't actually have to "plug it in" at all). On the upside, computer-related repetitive stress injuries will likely cease to be a problem. On the downside, we are borg and you will be assimilated.