Wednesday, July 26, 2006

THOUGH I DON'T ACTUALLY NEED ONE, I DO APPRECIATE HAVING A WEATHERMAN INFORM ME WHICH WAY THIS PARTICULAR WIND BLOWS: According to the Captivate Network (motto: "America's Fastest-Growing Source of Non-Consensual News Dissemination, Having Recently Surpassed Lower-Back Tattoos"), today's weather forecast in California is "Deadly Heat and Misery." I'll leave aside, for the moment, the notion that we equate "misery" with "10 degrees outside the hump of the bell curve" (after all, I live in a state where "rain causes large puddle at the corner of Ventura and Sepulveda" beats out primary election results on the local news, and no, I'm not kidding). I just like the fact that my weather forecast is now giving me information about my corresponding mental state.

So what's in your meteorological future? A low-pressure zone accompanied by high-pressure anxiety? Partly sunny with a hazy sense of entitlement?

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