Wednesday, September 17, 2003

WHY DENY THE OBVIOUS, CHILD? My first reaction in learning that Simon and Garfunkel would be touring again was to say, holy shit, that's cool, I'm sure tickets would be expensive but by gum it's worth it, right? I mean, it's Paul and Artie, heroes of my people, together again, creators of beautiful harmonies and, in Simon's case, songbook that is second to none.

Who wouldn't want to go?

(My second reaction: what, does Edie want another vacation house?)

But then I thought about it some more: why would I want to go? Merely to give tribute, to thank them for their 1960s songs? Well, that I can do right here, and it's not like if I don't go there's going to be an empty seat and they'll be all wondering and insecure about their status in the pantheon. They don't need little ol' me to do that.

Is it to see if they can still do it? They were solid enough in their Letterman appearance last week, so there's no reason to believe they can't sing well consistently over a several-month tour. This isn't like going out to see a 75-year-old Luke Appling hit a home run off Warren Spahn in the 1982 Cracker Jack Old-Timers Game; there's no doubt that these two performers can still entertain a crowd.

So is it nostalgia? Well, I wasn't there the first time, so I don't have any old memories to be resurrected. Yes, I did see him on the Graceland tour in 1986 or '87 (with my mom and little brother, one of my first real rock concerts), but I'm not squarely in the target demographic here.

Is it because I need to see what I'm going to look like when I age? Art Garfunkel represents one of two directions in which my hair will go later in life -- the straight-back Isro fade. (The other option? The Arlen, named for the Keystone State's senior senator, a widening bald circle starting from the middle with odd patches of hair barely hanging on. Think Gary Oldman in The Contender, and shudder in horror. Either way, I'm screwed.)

And it's not like they're such a great live act. Simon & Garfunkel was a studio band, and it's the studio sound they're looking to replicate here. (This is as opposed to Simon solo, touring with Ladysmith Black Mambazo or Brazilian percussionists Olodum, where he really expands the sound.) So why not just stay home and listen to the albums, and let one more couple from Merion hop in the Lexus, head to the Wachovia Center to recapture their youth?

I don't really have a good answer to that yet.

And, heck, if there's a reunion I'm waiting for, it's my contemporaries (more or less -- I got on the bandwagon late) the Pixies, who look to tour next year. Yes, it would make me feel good just to hear them play the songs again, and to be in an arena full of like-minded souls.

That said, if Simon and Garfunkel are covering "Debaser" on this tour (Paul: "Got me a movie!" -- Art: "Oh-ho-ho-ho!", and then together on the chorus), I am so there.

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