Thursday, August 9, 2007

BACON. IT'S THE CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE CHIP OF MEATS: And good enough for a win on tonight's Top Chef, thanks to the enthusiasm of Ted Allen ("If you want to make people happy, give them bacon.") and guest judge Govind Armstrong. Props to grits. Props to shrimps. Props variously, to Taquitos, Soft Tacos and Quesadillas but not to Cuban Sandwiches, Milkshakes or Teriyaki Chicken. And so it goes.

Speaking of Teriyaki Chicken, while out for some late night wings in Koreatown awhile ago -- yeah, okay, so not teriyaki exactly, but whatever -- our troop of merry adventurers had absolutely no luck running into Tony Bourdain, wicked drunk or otherwise. We did have some wicked wings though. They were real spicy and kind of pickled with a long burn and a strange sort of fermented taste to them. We liked them, and asked the server what they put on them to get all the funky flavors in there beneath the heat. His response: "Those make me go to the bathroom very hard." At which point we abandoned the wings and just ate the fries. Now that I know what to avoid though, there may be further forays in search of late night yakitori, wicked drunkeness and Tony Bourdain on Manhattan. Matt's worries aside, I don't think he's going to cut any of us.

In other news,

(1) Howie is like, such an asshole. He's, like, a bigger asshole every week. Wah wah wah. ...and yet I don't hate him like I hated, oh, everyone this time last season for shanking and shiving each other so transparently at the judges' table. It did feel right that his teammates told him to his face that he'd gone over the line in trying to serve others up, but what's with the crying and moaning? Who are you, Joey Pickles?? And how much did I love CJ calling Joey "Joey Pickles"? SO MUCH.

(2) When the reality show host tells you, with the camera rolling, that you have the night off to play, you do not have the night off to play. You signed up to be messed with like this, so no crying allowed. Nonetheless, Casey, Hung, Tre and Sara N. looked genuinely furious when the limo pulled up in front of those roach coaches.

(3) Casey and Sara N., furthermore, were alarmed in a way I did not understand about being made to work in their club clothes. Any speculation out there about the underlying dynamics of gender in the workplace (and/or women's roles in professional vs. social settings) that might have been driving that discomfort? We've had the "would they ever say that about a male chef" question already, so I figure headier gender issues are fair game.

Finally, for crying out loud, as if we didn't learn this last year, let's just let ice cream be ice cream already. Dale had it dialed and won a much needed but little-covered night off. I think all we got of his dinner conversation with Chef Armstrong was, "mm... this is really good".

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