ALOTT5MA's RULE AGAINST PERPITUTIES DESK wants to point out that if you mean to have your body cryonicgenically frozen after death, Hong Kong may be the place to do it.

ALOTT5MA CULTURAL SENSITIVITY DESK:  When Peter Pan Live! airs, it'll have several new songs--mostly trunk songs with new/revised lyrics.  Also, the lyrics to "Ugg-A-Wugg" have been tweaked-- the new version "replaces lyrics such as "ugg-a-wugg" and "gugg-a-bluck" with traditional Native American terms that have been approved by Native American consultant Jerod Tate."

AW, LUCY, NOT THE FOOTBALL AGAIN:  On the plus side, the trailer for next year's forthcoming Peanuts Movie does make nice use of "Linus and Lucy."  On the minus side, the 2.5D animation continues to kind of creep me out.

WELL, TONIGHT THANK GOD IT'S HIM, INSTEAD OF YOU: With all the calamities which have recently occurred, Gawker legitimately wonders if someone's trying to kill Bono.

DON'T YOU HAVE AN ENGLAND TO RUN?  Thanks to one of you, I have a birthday present to ourselves to give, because short of NPH eating fermented whale meat after singing a Billy Joel song during an a capella singing competition in order to qualify himself for EGOT, nothing really says ALOTT5MA like a new-to-me hatin' on Love Actually:

Everything in this movie is fucking insane. That's not how press conferences work. That's not how diplomacy works. That's not how prime ministers work. NOTHING IS HOW ANYTHING WORKS. That's not how weddings work, that's not how audio recording works, that's not how saxophones work, that's not how hair works, that's not how business meetings work, that's not how art works, that's not how grief works, that's not how primary school Christmas concerts work, that's not how airports work, that's not how music charts work, that's not how fat works, and none of it is how "love works."

SEVEN IMMEDIATE REACTIONS TO THE NEW #BANDAID30 SINGLE:  To which you can listen here, annotated here:

• That is one front-loaded first stanza in terms of contemporary talent.
• Why so sad, Sam Smith?
• I like that they changed Bono's line. I don't like what they changed it to.
• As long as you're changing lyrics, this isn't a hunger crisis and we're not trying to Feeeeed the wooorrrrld, so why not use "heal the world"?
• There are three fewer members of Kool and the Gang than in the original.
• Indeed, would it have killed them to invite Sting? George Michael? (Were they that busy, what with the inevitably doomed seafaring musical and whatever Michael's working on?)
• Band Aid 20 is worse.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO US:  Somewhat incomprehensibly and stubbornly, this blog turns twelve years old today. So thank you, Grantland's Katie Baker (and long-time lurker, who knew?), for this:

What's your favorite ol' site that never really evolved past Blogspot, but for the better? Mine is this: http://t.co/HxIeVYf9v9
— katiebakes (@katiebakes) November 15, 2014