Saturday, March 18, 2006

TOO BAD THERE'S NO WAY TO CONVERT PREDICTIVE TALENTS INTO MONEY: Charlie went 6-2 today (see below), including Wichita's shocking win, so what's going to happen on Sunday in MascotLand?

Bradley Braves vs. Pittsburgh Panthers: How can a mere jungle cat face courage and guts itself? Easy: with big sharp teeth. Pittsburgh

UConn Huskies vs. Kentucky Wildcats: The chunky lads may need something roomy to wear to their bar mitzvahs, but their opponents are, after all, just pussies. UConn

UNC Tarheels vs. George Mason Patriots: These "Pats" will quickly find themselves in a stickier mess than Washington's army at the Battle of Long Island. UNC

Texas Longhorns vs. NC State Wolfpack: The wolves will lick/their wound tonight/(clap clap)/They got gored by Texas. Texas

Ohio St. Buckeyes vs. Georgetown Hoyas: Hoya sounds like something my Uncle Irv would say after eating too much at the seder. But, then again, a buck doesn't get you far these days. Georgetown

Villanova Wildcats vs. Arizona Wildcats: In a feline vs. feline fight, I, um, flip a coin. Arizona

WV Mountaineers vs. NW State Demons: The only place darker, smokier and more damned than a Appalachian coal mine is hell! NW State

Memphis Tigers vs. Bucknell Bison: They're on the way to/ex-tinc-ti-on/we only know the Tigers wi-i-i-in. Memphis

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