2:40 a.m. Forever Plaid, a bunch of guys in loud plaid tuxedo jackets, announce they will pay tribute to Ed Sullivan by performing an entire Ed Sullivan show in 3 minutes 18 seconds.
Impossible? Not for these guys! They go to it, singing "Lady of Spain" while juggling balls and plates, throwing dog puppets through hula hoops and doing imitations of the Singing Nun and Alvin and the Chipmunks. It's a virtuoso performance and it makes you wonder: Can they do this 20-hour telethon in, say, 18 minutes 27 seconds? . . .
4 a.m. The tote board total is $13,225,103. But where is Jerry? He hasn't been seen for over an hour. Is he napping? Is he okay?
4:10 a.m. A guy appears onstage dressed in a bright orange jump suit that holds 18 bicycle horns. Squeezing the horns with his hands, his knees, his elbows and his head, Orange Man plays "Frere Jacques," "Old McDonald Had a Farm," "Mary Had a Little Lamb" and Vivaldi's "Four Seasons." Now, that's entertainment!
If after reading the piece you feel guilty for laughing, you can support the work of the Muscular Dystrophy Association via this link.
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