I WAS THERE AND I SAW WHAT YOU DID, SAW IT WITH MY OWN TWO EYES:  Having finally watched my first sustained Idol action of the year with the four hours of semifinals these past two nights ... is that all there is?  Is there anything this season which we haven't seen before -- other than the fact that they're now adding a lot of Adele songs into the mix?   The pageanty girls who are more sexy-for-Idol-without-actually-being-dangerous than talented singers, the African American men with immaculate voices who'll finish around 5th or 6th, "rockers" with "alternative" haircuts, and the country singers and white boys with guitars who will rule over them all ... there's not a performer I've seen over the past two nights who doesn't seem derivative of and lesser than the ten seasons which preceded this. So give me a reason, other than habit, to keep watching.

CELEBRITY DEATH ETIQUETTE: LESSONS FROM 35 YEARS OF CELEBRITY DEATHS*:

1. It is always appropriate to say something nice about the deceased.
2. It is considered polite to inflate the decendent's talents beyond any rational measure.
3. It is in poor taste to consider oneself constrained by inapplicable concepts like "objectivity" or "sanity."
4. Criticism of the decedent is a delicate balance. It is never under any circumstances appropriate to say anything less than superlatively complimentary of a deceased celebrity, except in those instances where mild or savage criticism is appropriate or even mandatory.
5. If any person within earshot or googleshot spent money on a product associated with the decedent before the person turned 28 or before the person went to grad school (whichever occurred first), any failure to acknowledge the absolute perfection of the celebrity decedent will be treated as a provocation warranting physical violence.
6. Celebrity death retroactively cures pedophilia.
7. One must always wait at least a respectful or nominal or none length of time before making a joke about a celebrity death.
8. The phrase "too soon?" is a foolproof way of ensuring that one does not offend a person who would not otherwise have been offended. Though the following statement is not an etiquette issue, the ratio of funny-to-unfunny jokes preceding the phrase "too soon" approaches a limit of zero, and the ratio of funny-to-unfunny instances of the use of the phrase "too soon" is exactly zero.
9. Literally everybody believes that suicide and drug addiction are sad and tragic, but it is a good idea in the event of a celebrity suicide or the death of a celebrity who struggled with drug addiction to make sure that everybody knows that you agree with this unanimous opinion by promiscuous use of the words "sad" and "tragic."
10. If a celebrity died at the same age or in the same month, season, year, or manner as another celebrity, it is a sign of respect to point out these similarities or proximities so that people of disparate accomplishments can be reduced to their common mortality.
11. Every celebrity's life was a testament to the divine rewards available to those who live properly, or ended in divine punishment for wickedness, but usually both, and one should take care to learn the lesson of the celebrity death, which is that one should and should not emulate the behavior of the decedent.

*Alternate title: Jesus Christ, Let It Go, You Asshole

LEAVING WESTDALE HIGH SCRAMBLING TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO PLAY THE PROM: Davy Jones of the Monkees has passed away from an apparent heart attack at the age of 66.

ISN'T IT A LITTLE EARLY FOR A FINALE? Wanted to talk a little about two shows which wrapped up their third seasons last night in fine form. On NBC, we had a solid finale for Parenthood, which managed to service pretty much all of the large cast well. Sure, some of the plot points were annoying (hopefully, this is finally the end of the Crosby/Jasmine merry-go-round) or seemed out of character (Adam's decision about the Luncheonette seemed entirely out of place), but there were plenty of solid moments, including the resolution of the season-long Julia/Joel plot and the brief father/daughter dance between Adam and Haddie, and, as one would expect from a Jason Katims show, plenty of handheld camera montages with a song playing in the background designed to make you emotional. A solid season of a solid show, and I hope we see it back--it's not a ratings bonanza, but it's the closest thing to a critical darling NBC has on the drama side right now, which would seem to help it, along with a finale that makes it easy to cut cast for next season, or at least reduce the number of episodes certain cast members appear in.

Over on USA, there was a finale for White Collar, a show which may be making the leap from "solid fun buddy cop show" to something a bit deeper as it explores questions of redemption and the difference between what is legal and what is moral (while still remaining a fun buddy cop show). It's an interesting hit of the reset button they managed, and I'm intrigued to see where they go from here--there are several directions I could see them going, but many of those marginalize part or all of the current supporting cast.

LOOK THE PART, BE THE PART:  If someone had told me sooner that The Wire involved researching campaign finance records in the days before OpenSecrets.org, I'd have started watching it much sooner.

It is Game Day in Baltimore for everyone. We've got a basketball game against Proposition Joe's squad; Omar's upping his game while Lester Freamon is upping the police's investigative game; Poot's getting some game over the phone; and Bubbs and Wallace may want out of the game altogether. (As to the latter, Tara Ariano notes: "D'Angelo looks at him wistfully, like he wishes he could quit the game and go back to the ninth grade himself. It's probably been ages since he diagrammed a good sentence.")  A more action-packed and plot-filled episode than most, and entertaining as hell.  Quote of the week goes to Lester:

In this country? Somebody's name has got to be on a piece of paper. A cousin, a girlfriend, a grandmother, a lieutenant he can trust...somebody's name is on a piece of paper. And here's the rub: You follow drugs, you get drug addicts and drug dealers. But you start to follow the money, and you don't know where the fuck it's going to take you.

SHE'S A SUCKER FOR FRENCH POETRY AND RHINESTONES. SHE'S VERY GENEROUS. SHE'S KIND TO STRANGERS AND CHILDREN, AND WHEN SHE STANDS IN THE SNOW SHE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGEL:  Isaac once wrote that "When Andie MacDowell smiles, it looks like she's smirking in judgment at you for watching one of her movies. It's the damnedest thing."

With that in mind, do read Andie MacDowell's discussion of her many roles today with the AV Club, including the whole Greystoke redubbing incident.

ROLL ON YOU BEARS: Sure, Joe Ayoob wasn't a very good quarterback for Cal Berkeley. But he is the world record holder for a paper-airplane toss.