Had I been paying attention, I'd have lost interest after Bates's shocking first round upset over Jason Voorhees. I mean, come ON. Jason Voorhees is never defeated; he's only temporarily inconvenienced -- be it a machete in the brain, burial, drowning in a lake (three times!), drowning in a NYC sewer full of toxic waste, riddled with bullets from high powered automatic weapons, blasted into the silent empty void of space, or actually taken down to Hell -- until the next movie starts.
Voorhees? Simply a slasher. Bates is a true psycho. (heh) That's not an upset, but the universe settling into it's proper positionl. (And I go for Annie over Jack, but boy is that a tough call.)
Simply a slasher? I respectfully disagree, good sir. Jason was only the most prolific slasher in movie history, and he could be damn creative for a kid who grew up in the woods, without what we might consider a typical education. He was relentless, albeit slow of foot. Kinda like Pat Burrell.
Bates, on the other hand, while skilled at sneaking up on unsuspecting victims, could be subdued by a regular old arm-bar hold in a fruit cellar, and [SPOILER ALERT FOR 27-YEAR-OLD SEQUEL] wasn't even the killer in Psycho II. (Now some among you may say, [SPOILER ALERTS FOR 24-YEAR-OLD THREEQUEL and 25-YEAR-OLD FIVEQUEL] "Sure, but Bates committed plenty of murders in Psycho III, and Jason wasn't the killer in F13 Part 5, either!" Well, allow me to retort: First, F13 Part 5 sucked BECAUSE Jason wasn't the killer. Second, he still WAS the killer in 12 movies, which was 10 more than featured Bates as mass murderer. And third, [raspberry sound].) So in sum, should have been an easy 3 over 14 win for the Boy from Crystal Lake.
And yes, Annie over Jack. Because hobbling beats dispatching Scatman Crothers in an empty hotel lobby.
The absence of Henry, from "Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer," renders this entire contest void. H:PoaSK is the last movie I ever saw that truly frightened me. Seeing it an a run-down theater certainly helped, but the audience seemed as stunned as I was. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099763/
Disappointed they didn't stick David Byrne in there as the 65 seed.
ReplyDeleteHad I been paying attention, I'd have lost interest after Bates's shocking first round upset over Jason Voorhees. I mean, come ON. Jason Voorhees is never defeated; he's only temporarily inconvenienced -- be it a machete in the brain, burial, drowning in a lake (three times!), drowning in a NYC sewer full of toxic waste, riddled with bullets from high powered automatic weapons, blasted into the silent empty void of space, or actually taken down to Hell -- until the next movie starts.
ReplyDeleteCe que j'ai fait, ce soir-la?
ReplyDeleteVoorhees? Simply a slasher. Bates is a true psycho. (heh) That's not an upset, but the universe settling into it's proper positionl. (And I go for Annie over Jack, but boy is that a tough call.)
ReplyDeleteSimply a slasher? I respectfully disagree, good sir. Jason was only the most prolific slasher in movie history, and he could be damn creative for a kid who grew up in the woods, without what we might consider a typical education. He was relentless, albeit slow of foot. Kinda like Pat Burrell.
ReplyDeleteBates, on the other hand, while skilled at sneaking up on unsuspecting victims, could be subdued by a regular old arm-bar hold in a fruit cellar, and [SPOILER ALERT FOR 27-YEAR-OLD SEQUEL] wasn't even the killer in Psycho II. (Now some among you may say, [SPOILER ALERTS FOR 24-YEAR-OLD THREEQUEL and 25-YEAR-OLD FIVEQUEL] "Sure, but Bates committed plenty of murders in Psycho III, and Jason wasn't the killer in F13 Part 5, either!" Well, allow me to retort: First, F13 Part 5 sucked BECAUSE Jason wasn't the killer. Second, he still WAS the killer in 12 movies, which was 10 more than featured Bates as mass murderer. And third, [raspberry sound].) So in sum, should have been an easy 3 over 14 win for the Boy from Crystal Lake.
And yes, Annie over Jack. Because hobbling beats dispatching Scatman Crothers in an empty hotel lobby.
The absence of Henry, from "Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer," renders this entire contest void. H:PoaSK is the last movie I ever saw that truly frightened me. Seeing it an a run-down theater certainly helped, but the audience seemed as stunned as I was. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099763/
ReplyDelete