SOMETHING STUPID: Maureen Ryan did not care for this weekend's HBO biopic Hemingway and Gellhorn, starring Clive Owen and Nicole Kidman:
Now that the first season of "Smash" has ended, this is the best hate-watching fodder we'll probably have for many months.
Why is hate-watching the only realistic option? Because loving or even liking this expensive misfire is simply not possible. Even more than last year's turgid "Mildred Pierce," "Hemingway and Gellhorn" is a gigantic missed opportunity, a jaw-droppingly trying waste of time. Don't let the fancy names in the cast fool you: This is a stupid, stupid movie.
We don't hate-watch Syfy's Saturday movie offerings -- "Sharktopus," "Mansquito" and the like -- because they know they're trash and they good-naturedly embrace their energetic lack of quality. Not only is "Hemingway and Gellhorn" wretched, it is bathed in pretentiousness and pseudo-intellectual delusions of grandeur. It's not just crap, it's expensive, painfully "artistic" crap starring a lot of actors who should have known better once they took a look at the script, which is hilariously awful.
Yes, but does it feature
a scene in which Ms. Kidman urinates on one of the stars of High School Musical?