THE LADY WILL HAVE THE KNOCKWURST AND I'LL HAVE THE SAME: Alas, tonight somewhere in this great country of ours, a young lady (presumedly) is sitting in a Pizza Hut with that cute boy from her algebra class and trying to dazzle him with a conversation revolving around such pop culture minutiae as how many episodes of "One Day at a Time" aired, Cybil Sheppard's irritable bowels, and, yes, how much Santa's sack looks like an airborne scrotum.
All of us here at ALOTTFMA hope the date went well.
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