Tuesday, May 1, 2012

WHAT DO YOU NEED THAT FOR, DUDE?  In honor of today's publication of Robert Caro's LBJ IV: A New Hope, I invite you to share your favorite Johnsons of fact and fiction.

My list, of course, begins with Gabby Johnson, to whom we are all indebted for clearly stating what needed to be said in authentic frontier gibberish, expressing a courage little seen in this day and age.

31 comments:

  1. Joseph J, Finn9:06 AM

    Gabby Johnson is right!

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  2. Special Agent Johnson and Special Agent Johnson. No relation.

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  3. Except for that one "James Mungro Just Pawn In Game of Life" crack you always beat me to the Blazing Saddles jokes.

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  4. Celendra10:14 AM

    What are we made of? Our fathers came across the prairies, fought Indians, fought drought, fought locusts, fought Dix... remember when Richard Dix came in here and tried to take over this town? Well, we didn't give up then, and by gum, we're not going to give up now!
    <span></span>

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  5. TPE posted on the mobile, and it's not showing up on the site:

    "Special Agent Johnson and Special Agent Johnson. No relation."

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  6. I'm going to throw in Dakota Johnson, who had a small part in the movie "The Five-Year Engagement" (which I saw last weekend and really enjoyed, if not loved).  Every time on screen, I kept thinking, "WHERE have I seen her before?" Usually I can get these things on my own, but I had to look her up - turned out I was remembering her one (apparently memorable) scene in "The Social Network" where Sean Parker sleeps with a college student (Johnson) and discovers Facebook on her computer.  Oh, and it turns out she's the daughter of Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith.

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  7. Carrie10:40 AM

    And speaking of Melanie Griffith, let's go with the scene in "Working Girl" where Philip Bosco tells Harrison Ford to "stop thinking with your Johnson!"

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  8. Jordan11:10 AM

    OHHHHHH!  WHAT A GAME! UHHHH AHHHHH! INSTANT CLASSIC!

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  9. Joseph J. Finn11:11 AM

    Sue, I noticed Dakota Johnson in a small role in 21 Jump Street on Friday; not a huge part, but she has a very interesting face so I had to look up who she is. And then I felt old that one of Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith's kids is 22.

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  10. I'll take Cave Johnson from Portal II.

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  11. Mrs. Johnson, my second grade teacher

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  12. kd bart11:48 AM

    Gus Johnson.

    He makes any sporting event exciting.

    http://www.gusjohnsongetsbuckets.com/

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  13. Brian Johnson, of the Breakfast Club.  Or, more accurately, his father, who is NOT Mr. Rogers but rather Mr. Johnson.

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  14. bristlesage12:31 PM

    Gotta go with Samuel Johnson.  I do love a dictionary.

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  15. Genevieve12:35 PM

    I remember her very clearly from that scene (great scene).  Had no idea she was their daughter, though I can see it.  Glad she's in Five-Year Engagement.

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  16. Genevieve12:38 PM

    Davey Johnson, manager of the Washington Nationals, who have been in first place in their division for quite a while, even though their best hitter (Morse) has been on the DL since the start of the season and others have also gone out.

    I was going to say Kristen Johnson from Third Rock, but it turns out she's Johnston. 

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  17. Chad Ochocinco nee Johnson

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  18. Will K1:11 PM

    Thomas Johnson - shortest tenure of any Justice on U.S. Supreme Court (August 6, 1792-January 16, 1793). Wrote first United States Supreme Court opinion

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  19. In re your tag line (which I failed to notice the first time):  Shut the fuck up, Donny.

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  20. Yes, but no one has identified the through-line here yet.

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  21. What do you mean?

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  22. Joseph J. Finn3:52 PM

    Depends; does Adam need his rod or his johnson?

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  23. mikeski4:08 PM

    This topic is very interesting...but stupid.

    So, Arte Johnson.

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  24. The same actor who praises Gabby Johnson for his Authentic Frontier Gibberish plays Jeffrey (not the Dude) Lebowski.

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  25. Joseph J. Finn5:19 PM

    Seriously, we haven't heard from Brother Nicely-Nicely Johnson yet?

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  26. Jim Bell7:26 PM

    I like Clam strips.  Ipswich clam strips Howard.

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  27. kd bart7:46 PM

    Ray J Johnson

    You can call me Ray.  You can call me J.  You can call Ray J.  But you don't have to call me Johnson.

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  28. bill.8:10 PM

    Prudence Johnson, one of my favorite singers.

    Other Johnsons in my iTunes: Ruby Johnson, Robert Johnson, Jesse Johnson, Jack Johnson

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  29. panduh8:26 PM

    In Chicago there's TV reporter Dick Johnson. I'm not kidding.

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  30. MMMmmmmmmm... that's good internets...

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  31. Dang.  This reminds me that I really do need to read those books...

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