Thursday, September 14, 2006

THE WAL-MART OF SARCASTIC INTERNET COMMENTARY: The Nick Denton Gawker Media Empire today extends its monopoly on an essentially unmonopolizable market with the addition of Idolator, a poorly-named gossip aggregator about pop music whose name will be so dated in about four years. That means that a Dentonite is right now working a self-referential comment about getting drunk into a post on New York; Hollywood and all Firecrotch-related happenings; the scintillating social world of Silicon Valley; politics and Washington (I was going to say "Republican anal sex," but really, that was like four years ago); music; gadgetry; cars; sports; porn; computer games (I'm fairly certain this is just a fake screen that pops up from a panic button on the Fleshbot page); shopping; urban travel (wha?); information and time management (so hip you can smell the velvet rope); and stuff on my cat. Okay, that last one is independent. In other words, if you live in, visit, listen to, watch, play, drive, struggle to understand the features of, masturbate to, buy, or feel impelled to alphabetize it, Denton is covering it. If you put it on your cat, go elsewhere, you sicko.

I'm pretty sure that, with the exception of blind spots in books (who reads 'em!), gambling (Gawker Media used to cover this, but ironically lost in a bet with a shadowy Taiwanese businessman), and places where you can't get food from Nobu Matsuhisa, Gawker Media is now officially omniscient.

Incidentally, Denton, drunk with his god-like power, is rumored to be contemplating fiendish Dr. Moreau-ish experiments on his blogs. Fear the Defamwag (covering the Ojai gossip scene) and the Fleshmodo (porn gadgetry).

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