Tuesday, September 21, 2010

SECOND PLACE, UNDOUBTEDLY, GOES TO STING: A few weekends ago I sat on a Cape Cod beach in the aftermath of Hurricane Tropical Storm Well It Rained A Lot Earl with frequent commenter Chuck and his family, as well as the sconstants and others, and I forget how we got to this topic but we started singing Toto's 1983 number-one hit "Africa" and couldn't help but wonder: is there a worse metaphor in all of pop music than "I know that I must do what's right -- as sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti."

Seriously. What, exactly, is a mountain's elevation (in comparison to another mountain) supposed to tell us about a decision to pursue a woman? Add to that the decidedly sub-Dylan cramming of syllables into the verse, and as admittedly catchy as the song is musically the whole damn thing just makes no sense. Is there worse out there?