Friday, March 4, 2011

HELLO, I REALLY, REALLY MUST BE GOING NOW:  Citing a variety of health issues as well as his perception that listeners have grown sick of and "want to strangle" him, Phil Collins has announced his retirement from the music business. "It's hardly surprising that people grew to hate me. I'm sorry that it was all so successful. I honestly didn't mean it to happen like that," he says.

Out of respect, I will link to both his London and South Philadelphia performances of July 13, 1985, and link to, but not transcribe, the appropriate NSFW Patrick Bateman monologue.

19 comments:

  1. StvMg6:03 PM

    His coming back to sing is against all odds, but it's a chance he's got to take.

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  2. But seriously, do you not take this news at face value?  

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  3. To preempt Matt: given the failure of Tarzan on Broadway, Collins is -GO-.  

    How can the world just let him walk away? Just let him leave, without a trace?

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  4. Meghan6:55 PM

    All I know is that a day without Phil Collins music us another day in paradise.

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  5. isaac_spaceman7:44 PM

    Did he announce his retirement in a fax to his adoring fans?*

    *Does this count as an obscure reference?  

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  6. Paul Tabachneck8:10 PM

    If he wants to retire, who are we to question him?  Jesus, he knows him, and he knows he's right.

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  7. Paul Tabachneck8:11 PM

    It's always the same, Adam.  It's just a shame, that's all.

    (I cannot believe I beat you all to this one.)

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  8. Meghan8:44 PM

    I'm in a land of confusion.

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  9. Adam C.9:02 PM

    I don't care anymore.  Can't you hear I don't care anymore?  No more.  No more.

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  10. Someday he'll be sorry. Someday, when he's free.

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  11. Joseph J. Finn9:50 PM

    Man, I love you guys some nights.

    (Seriously, I've enjoyed Phil Collins in the past.  If he wants to take it easy, good on him and thanks for the enjoyment I've had from his music.  But you still need to make sure to give that Oscar to Aimee Mann or Parker & Shaiman.

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  12. Marsha12:40 AM

    He's throwing it all away. Is there something that we can say to make him change his mind?

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  13. You know and I know, Marsha, that he don't want to go.

    By the way, is he a Switzerland citizen now?  Because otherwise, if that's where he's living, I understand that it's no fun to lack the full rights of citizenship.

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  14. girard3111:14 AM

    How many among us were more stunned by the news he was still performing.

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  15. Paul Tabachneck11:33 AM

    Maybe it's not real, Marsha, just, say, a pseu-pseu-pseudioretirement.

    (aaaand stretch)

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  16. The Pathetic Earthling4:22 PM

    It's like premorse, really.

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  17. <span>This must be a misunderstanding.  This must be some kind of mistake.  
     
    (But maybe he felt out of place in today's pop scene because he can't dance?)</span>

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  18. Stacie from St. Louis7:36 PM

    I have nothing to add except that ya'll are AWESOME.

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  19. I thought that was pretty funny, Paul, which i why I'm surprised that there's been no reply at all, no reply at all.<span> </span>

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