PITHIER, SNARKIER, BITTER-ER: So here's an Olympic proposal: as part of the Closing Ceremonies, every gold medal winner should be gathered on the field (and wearing the attire in which each medaled) for a huge-ass game of dodgeball. Gymnasts, boxers, sailors, fencers, shotputters and weightlifters in a free-for-all. Will the members of the larger teams (soccer, basketball) turn on each other? Will shoe endorsement loyalty trump nation? Flavor Flav-sized gold medal for the winner.
Open thread for tonight's broadcast competition, as well as the bullshit which happened to the South Korean semifinalist in women's épée today (more here), and no, this still doesn't make up for Roy Jones Jr. getting screwed.
Not to mention the scoring adjustment in men's gymnastics.
ReplyDeleteFYI -- I love the dodge ball idea,
First I'm hearing about the epee stuff. That is, indeed, bullshit. And to have to sit out there while it's happening - ugh.
ReplyDeleteShe didn't leave because she was afraid of being disqualified ...and the IOC only takes cash: "As part of the rules it is required that the Korean official lay down a sum of money for the appeal to be valid. That procedure is now in progress."
ReplyDeleteI also seem to remember that the judges completely gave the gold medal in one weight division of Tae Kwon Do to a Korean over a 17-year old American who cleaned the floor with the Korean guy.
ReplyDeleteThe SKOC, apparently, has promised not to give up.
ReplyDeleteDogdeball idea is brilliant. I'd watch that.
ReplyDeleteIf they ever do the dodgeball, I'm going to bet on the team that has all the water polo and team handball players.
ReplyDeleteBut the soccer players should be able to dive to the ground repeatedly to avoid getting hit by the ball.
ReplyDeleteAlso, gymnasts make small targets. How do you think I was more than halfway decent at dodgeball back in the day?
Cheating with a lack of height?
ReplyDeleteNBC spoiled the women's 100m backstroke final by airing a promo for tomorrow's Today show featuring Missy Franklin reuniting with her parents and showing them her gold medal...in the commercial break before the her race actually aired. I just don't understand why they can't get this right.
ReplyDeleteLook on the bright side. If NBC goes out of business before 2014, the IOC will *have* to let someone else broadcast the games.
ReplyDeleteOne can only hope.
ReplyDeleteRemember my attire requirement. Those water polo boys get speedos, no shoes.
ReplyDeleteDo the equestrians get their horses? Or are the horses separate players?
ReplyDeleteNo horses, because with all the martial artists and boxers we could have a Mongo situation.
ReplyDeleteJust saw the Japanese guys protesting their gymnastics scores. Did nobody at the IOC think (talk about a question that answers itself) about the optics of teams walking up to the judges with a pile of cash in hand to ask for the ruling they want????
ReplyDeleteThe real test is going to be whether they even bother to edit the promo out for the west coast broadcast.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather have that dodgeball with the silver medalists. Then they get ONE LAST SHOT at gold.
ReplyDeleteWill Effie Trinket be officiating this?
ReplyDeleteThey would be concerned the amount of cash would appear too small if the denominations of bills were large enough?
ReplyDeleteLet's say you are NBC. Let's say that you are developing an all-sports cable channel which you hope to develop into a national brand with more favorable placement on TV channel listings. Let's also say you can broadcast the olympics. In prime time, would you show (a) the olympic rebroadcasts not being shown on your broadcast channel? or (b) poker tournaments from 2011?
ReplyDeleteI encourage showing MLS matches as they are occuring, especially when JackMac is playing, but come on.
Libby, I saw that and was so mad about that. They were hyping the 100M backstroke race for an hour or so, showed a profile of Franklin, built up the hype... and then ruined it with a commercial. What's the point of airing these things in prime time, hours after they happen but hoping people will be unspoiled, if they're going to spoil it right there in prime time?
ReplyDeleteI thought exactly this last night. They couldn't toss on the medal rounds for Judo or Weightlifting or something?
ReplyDeleteI was so angry about this that I actually yelled at my TV. And then sent a couple of angry tweets to nbc.
ReplyDeleteIs there a term for the rage one feels when an Olympic (or other sporting) event is spoiled just moments before it takes place? Like road rage, but not. If there isn't already a word for that, we need one.
Next time around, we should let the IOC sort out the broadcasting, and NBC can handle the timekeeping. Couldn't be any worse!
ReplyDeleteThis: https://twitter.com/NBCDelayed
ReplyDeleteLittleredyarn, you totally stole my idea. Congratulations winners, and welcome to the Hunger Games. May the odds be ever in your favor! (cue the US Archery Team!)
ReplyDeleteWhat the literal, heaving FUCK was this? Mr. Gleemonex actually started to get mad at me for my incredulous questioning when he was trying to tell me about it (I'd gone up to bed first -- I'm the one who has to get up five times a goddamn night with the baby). I was all: "Money? CASH FUCKING MONEY? Are you kidding me? And this is -- this is PROCEDURE? This is a RULE? When in the history of ever has this been a -- who carries cash to the Olympics? What the shit?" I still don't get it -- it's serious bizarro-world ratfuckery. Jesus H. Christ in a sidecar drinking tequila ...
ReplyDeleteSo just the poncy boots and tight jackets for the horsey riders ... I am liking this idea more and more.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure the Germans have such a word.
ReplyDeleteIt's the Italian archery team I'd bet on ... ;-)
ReplyDeleteI believe it's wutaufverfruhtprophezeiungolympischensteirscheisse.
ReplyDeleteGleemonex, you are making me give serious thought to getting in the car and driving long distances just to watch the Olympics with you.
ReplyDeleteOh my God, that is wonderful.
ReplyDelete