I'M NOT SURE THE ODDS ARE THIS IDEA'S FAVOR:  I quite liked The Hunger Games and am looking forward to its sequel, but I'm not quite sure how it would work as a theme park attraction, given its rather grim premise--maybe something where Katniss escorts you as you sneak out of District 12 to go hunting and then must evade troopers from The Capital?

LOOK AT THE MONSTROSITY THAT HAS RISEN BEFORE OUR EYES IN THE PAST COUPLE OF YEARS AND WEEP:  It's safe to say that the WaPo's Thomas Boswell has concerns about the National Football League:

The NFL doesn’t have a PR problem. It has a reality problem. And it may be a grave one. Every month — and it seems every few days — the NFL is inundated by new, barely suspected revelations. What has the NFL become? Or is this what it has been for some time? Is the truth coming out of the shadows? 

The list is stunning. Its cumulative effect, not any one particular item, is the true confidence-shaking shock.

ISN'T IT IRONIC? In edgier musical theatre news, Alanis Morissette is trying to bring a musical based on Jagged Little Pill to the stage.  No book-writer is attached, but Tom Kitt (arrangements for American Idiot, and original scores for Next To Normal and the upcoming If/Then) will provide orchestrations/arrangements.  So, who plays the edgy, gothy Alanis surrogate?  (My money?  Jennifer Damiano of Next to Normal and Spider-Man fame.)

GOOD OLD RELIABLE NATHAN:  Nathan Lane, Megan Mullally, Patrick Wilson, and Sierra Boggess will headline an in-concert performance of Guys and Dolls at a Carnegie Hall benefit next April.

In related news, a reminder: 2011's New York Philharmonic production of Company, with NPH, Patti LuPone, Christina Hendricks, Stephen Colbert and many other faves, airs on your local PBS station tonight. (Query: let Lucy watch it in full? isolated numbers?)

APART FROM COST CONSIDERATIONS, THERE IS THE ISSUE OF WHETHER PLASTIC SMELTING MACHINES WERE APPROPRIATE FOR USE IN FOOD OUTLETS:  McDonald's is thinking about having 3-D printers in restaurants to produce, on-demand, whatever Happy Meal toy a kid wants.

THERE WAS MORE THAN ONE LOBSTER PRESENT AT THE BIRTH OF JESUS?  In recognition of the film's tenth anniversary this week, The Hairpin is publishing daily fan-fic on what happened to each of Love Actually's pairings ten years later.

(We may have discussed this film in passing before. As I noted a few years ago, if you watch Love Actually backwards, it's the interwoven stories of a bunch of British men who gradually realize that they shouldn't be dating women who work for them.)

added: The cast reminisces.

KAN JAG FÅ TVÅ BILJETTER TILL THELMA OCH LOUISE?  As part of their official movie ratings system, some Swedish theaters will now inform moviegoers as to how films perform on the Bechdel Test.

"MAY WE MURDER YOU?" One of the best things SNL has done this year was the Wes Anderson horror film parody, and now there's a piece chronicling the meticulous attention to detail and last-minute finalization that went into it.

LAMB SHANK WITH CURRIED SUNCHOKE PUREE BUTCHER FOR THE WORLD: Famed Chicago chef Charlie Trotter died today. He was 54.

Trotter's eponymous Lincoln Park restaurant is largely credited with putting the Chicago culinary scene. The eatery, which opened in 1987 and closed in August 2012, received near universal praise, including a 1999 James Beard award for outstanding chef. Like many great chefs, Trotter was complicated and mercurial, with his behavior bordering on the bizarre several times since the restaurant closed.

The Chicago Tribune's Mark Caro wrote perhaps the defining profile of Trotter last year.

THE WORD ABIDES:  Linguists claim to have finally figured out the origin of the word "dude."

THAT'S NOT A PIRATE. THAT'S SOME DUDE FROM ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE WHO GOT TOO DRUNK AT THE OFFICE HALLOWEEN PARTY WHILE DRESSED AS A PIRATE:  Mike Tanier on the some of the best, and worst team logos in professional sports history.

EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE MY KODACHROME AWAY, OR SAINT AGNES AND THE BURNING TRAIN IN THE DISTANCE:  Do you like wordy, socially conscious singer-songwriters who left insanely popular duos/trios to build equally popular solo careers which dabbled in world music and made forays into the Broadway scene?  Because Paul Simon and Sting will tour together in early 2014.

TIME TO SCREW MARVIN MILLER AGAIN: The National Baseball Hall of Fame has nominated the following twelve men for its Veterans Committee expansion-era ballot.

Dave Concepcion, Bobby Cox, Steve Garvey, Tommy John, Tony La Russa, Billy Martin, Marvin Miller, Dave Parker, Dan Quisenberry, Ted Simmons, George Steinbrenner, Joe Torre.

Anyone receiving 75% of the Committee's vote will be inducted in July; Pat Gillick was voted in the last time the Expansion Era was considered, with the now-late Marvin Miller falling one vote short.

Your Doodle ballot is here.

STEP ONE: ADMITTING YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. That was an appropriately self-lacerating way for SNL to open this week, but it doesn't mean much unless Lorne Michaels actually hires new cast members who look like the America the show is trying to mock, even if it means going outside the traditional feeder schools.