THE PEOPLE, UNITED, WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED:  Shake Shack will bring back the crinkle-cut fries.

NPR THUNDERDOME:  Two Iras enter--Glass and Flatow--one Ira leaves.  Who ya got?

NEXT TIME YOU'RE AT THE CHECKOUT COUNTER AND HEAR THAT BEEP: One contestant remembers the fun he had on Supermarket Sweep.

WELCOME TO NABOO, WHERE THE SAND IS NEITHER COARSE NOR ROUGH NOR IRRITATING:  Next year, Disney will be revealing plans for “a far greater Star Wars presence in its theme parks."

A BRIGHT, SHINING LIE:  I've always been a fan of critics deflating Dead Poets Society, and as part of THND's Summer of '89 series Odie Henderson came up with something I hadn't considered before:

The most egregious thing about Dead Poets Society is how not one person takes the inspirational teacher's advice when it matters, even after the death of the one character who dared to seize his day. Every student folds when it matters most: defending their beloved teacher. Yet, after the damage has been done and the threat of repercussion has passed, several of these same students stand on their desks to honor their now fired hero. "Oh Captain, my Captain!" they recite in a moment of Walt Whitman-inspired "solidarity" with Keating. Keating is touched, but he should have called bullshit on these cowards. He should have kicked the desk from under a former student and screamed, "Where was your courage when it was inconvenient? You can't seize a day that's already passed!" Instead, Dead Poets Society ends with Keating's thanks, which serve as a stamp of approval against the always painful urge to do the right thing, no matter how inconvenient.

Tom Schulman won the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay for the film, ahead of Crimes and Misdemeanors (Woody Allen), Do the Right Thing (Spike Lee), Sex, Lies, and Videotape (Steven Soderbergh), and When Harry Met Sally... (Nora Ephron).

A BONA FIDE, ELECTRIFIED, SIX CAR MONORAIL! The Dallas Zoo monorail is malfunctioning, leaving folks stranded.

IT'S BEEN A LONG, LONG DAY AND YOU'VE GOT THE SANDMAN AT YOUR DOOR: Numerous sources report that James Corden will be replacing Craig Ferguson as host of the Late, Late Show.  Corden isn't terribly well known on these shores yet, but co-created and co-starred in the successful British sitcom Gavin & Stacey, has a Tony for One Man, Two Guvnors, and is playing The Baker in Into The Woods.  Kind of an oddball choice, to be sure (even if it's yet another white guy).  No word on if the show will move to NYC or stay in LA.

TIME TO CHILLAX WITH SOME QAT:  New two-letter words in next week's Official Scrabble Players' Dictionary (5th) are da, gi, po, and te. "To be included in the 36-year-old book — this is the fifth edition — a word must be found in a standard dictionary, can't require capitalization, can't have hyphens or apostrophes and can't be an abbreviation, in addition to being two to eight letters, reflecting the seven tiles players draw plus an eighth already on the board they can attach a long word to for bonus points."

HONEYDON'T:  Guess what kind of melon you're eating one-fifth as much as you do cantaloupes?

“I trashed more mass in honeydew than in unfinished stacks of pancakes,” says Dawn Eisner, who supervised a breakfast buffet at the Radisson Plaza in Kalamazoo, Mich., for six years, ending in 2011. “Nobody eats the green melon.” So why even serve it? “It looks nice next to watermelon, cantaloupe and pineapple,” she said.

SADLY, THE TIEBREAKER WAS NOT "TRIAL BY COMBAT:" Last week's Jeopardy! Teen Tournament ended in a tie and sudden death to determine who'd be the title holder.

THE FRIENDS ZONE:  A new deal for Big Bang Theory stars Jim Parsons, Johnny Galecki, and Kaley Cuoco will pay each actor $1M/episode for the next three seasons, tripling their current salaries, and raises their ownership stake in the show to over 1% each: "All in, I hear Parsons, Galecki and Cuoco are poised to make at least $90 million dollars each over the lives of the deals, with some observers noting that the total could conceivably rise towards $100 million if Big Bang continues to be as strong in syndication and auxiliary markets."  Simon Helberg and Kunal Nayyar remain in negotiations.

So, um, confession time: I've never seen an episode. Should I start, and if so, where?

THE HONESTY'S TOO MUCH:  If there's one place that lies uncomfortable in the heretofore unknown intersection between this blog's loves and hates, it's random Canada-bashing ... but in slideshow form.  But if you can stomach it, this HuffPo list of Fifty Worst Canadian Songs Ever is worth your time because #10 is Alanis Morissette's pre-Jagged "Too Hot," which as the description confirms is truly a lost Robin Sparkles masterpiece.  Also, "Sometimes When We Touch" is only in second place, because Nickelback.