I'M MISS WORLD. SOMEBODY, KILL ME: Denial's not just a technique in New Jersey courtrooms:

"What has happened is a bit of a shame because the international press has highlighted a little incidence of some rioting way out of all proportion," Guy Murray-Bruce, the director of Miss World Nigeria, told BBC radio.

Seriously, what's two hundred deaths when there's beauty to be promoted?

One note: Miss World is a British-based organization, unaffiliated with the Trump-run Miss USA, Miss Teen USA or Miss Universe, or with the Miss America scholarship competition. Yeah, I know, it'd be more entertaining if the Donald were involved, but he had his own pageant issues this year.

RECIPROCITY RULES! Welcome to everyone coming here via Howard Bashman's most excellent How Appealing blog. As far as what this blog is, well, res ipsa loquitor, so far, I guess. If you like this place, spread the word.

AND, FOR ONCE, DEATH WAS AN OPTION: Updating from my previous note, Rabbi Fred Neulander was sentenced yesterday to a life term, with a minimum of 30 years to be served in prison. The rabbi's last sermon worked.

edited to add: The "sermon" is now online, which tries to answer the question: how does a man plead for mercy for an act he has not acknowledged committing? By, umm . . .

And I wanted to spend the days of the years of my life — long days of long years of my life — with her. We had a little dialogue that I'm sure each and every one of you has or that you might have with your close friend, with your beloved, with your husband, with your wife, with your partner. One of us would say to the other, "I want to grow old with you." And the other would lean over and whisper, "I want to grow old with you too, but let's do it slowly."

Yeah, but I guess the whole "hiring someone to have her killed so I can carry on with my mistress who I started seeing immediately after presiding of her husband's funeral" thing threw a little wrench into that plan. "Oops."

It's the quintessence of chutzpah to plead for mercy based upon the goodness of the person you had killed, and yet that's exactly what he did. Full coverage available here.

AN UNSURPRISING MOVE OF MARKETING GENIUS: Shhh! MopeyBoy's new book is now available through Amazon!

Much initial hype was borne of the fact that Dave Eggers' new novel was only going to be sold through his own website and 100 carefully-selected independent booksellers. No Amazon, no B&N, no Borders -- he was cutting them all out of the loop, publishing the book himself, selling only through the small and loyal.

It was allegedly going to be a "dangerous venture", a "daring" approach which might help revolutionize the publishing industry. According to Eggers, "As for Amazon, we decided this time to experiment with having this book available through our website only. We figured if people were ordering it online, they might as well order it from us."

Well, as always, Chuck D. was right. Don't believe the hype. Eggers has a coast to coast bestseller on his hands and a massive amount of free publicity for what boils down to a carefully crafted marketing device: "Buy my book because I'm making it harder to buy my book!" It's little different from Burger King's claiming to be alternative because "Sometimes, you've gotta break the rules" or Outback Steakhouse's anarchic "No Rules. Just Right." proclamation.

For all the good work Eggers is doing, let's not lose sight of reality: he's an author, and he's trying to get you to buy his book. No less, no more.

DID THEY ALSO CONSULT CHEVY CHASE? The LA Times reports today on allegations that bloated former action star Steven Seagal threatened a Times reporter for investigating his relationship with the mob. I don't know, don't care about the details. I just love this quote:

"This uncorroborated allegation by someone arrested is pure fiction and is nothing more than a transparent attempt to divert attention from himself and the real perpetrators," said attorney Martin R. Pollner, who represents Seagal. "This is part of an unrelenting campaign to disparage Mr. Seagal and reads like a bad screenplay."

Well, if anyone would know what a bad screenplay looked like . . .

[Roger Ebert, on Seagal's new movie: "Seagal's great contribution to the movie is to look very serious, even menacing, in closeups carefully framed to hide his double chin. I do not object to the fact that he's put on weight. Look who's talking. I object to the fact that he thinks he can conceal it from us with knee-length coats and tricky camera angles. I would rather see a movie about a pudgy karate fighter than a movie about a guy you never get a good look at."]

"THEN I GOT A SECOND CHANCE." Now that Will Ferrell has left for the big screen, Darrell Hammond stands as SNL's best male performer. (For the first time in SNL history, the women are more talented than the men, but that's another essay, for another day -- on the greatness of Dratch-Fey-Poehler-Rudolph.)

Anyway, great profile on Hammond in the Orlando Sentinel, on Hammond, his work, and his struggles with addiction. Thorough and well-done. And it contains this beaut of a quote from executive producer Lorne Michaels, which is quite telling: "'The show doesn't go on the air because it's ready. It goes on because it's 11:30."

P.S. If you haven't picked up the new Tom Shales book on this history of SNL, do so. It's a little too heavy on the interpersonal drama and too light on talking about the comedy itself, but it's worth reading if only for the story of the the night Damon Wayans got himself fired. Great stuff.

HUZZAH! Congratulations to the students and faculty of the Criminal and Juvenile Justice Project of the Edwin F. Mandel Legal Aid Clinic at The University of Chicago Law School for their successful challenge of Illinois' criminal sentencing statutes, which would have imposed a life term for a 15-year-old boy for doing the following:

According to defendant, on the night of the murders, Arthur Beckom and Kentrell Stoutmire observed people walking through their neighborhood that they believed belonged to a rival gang. Beckom and Stoutmire approached defendant, who was standing outside on a corner in the neighborhood, and asked him to stand as a lookout. Defendant saw that both Beckom and Stoutmire had guns in their possession, and although defendant never handled or touched the guns, he agreed to stand as a lookout. One minute later, Beckom and Stoutmire fired gunshots in the direction of Jones and Alexander, who both died as a result of their injuries. Once the shooting began, defendant ran to his girlfriend's house.

But under Illinois law, "the court shall sentence the defendant to a term of natural life imprisonment when the death penalty is not imposed if . . . irrespective of the defendant's age at the time of the commission of the offense, is found guilty of murdering more than one victim." 730 ILCS 5/5-8-1(a)(1)(c)(ii). [emphasis mine]

No gun, no affirmative bad acts, life term? The trial court and a unanimous Illinois Supreme Court agreed that for a child convicted under a theory of an accountability theory, this was too much to stomach:

Accordingly, we hold that the penalty mandated by the multiple-murder sentencing statute as applied to this defendant is particularly harsh and unconstitutionally disproportionate. We agree with defendant that a mandatory sentence of natural life in prison with no possibility of parole grossly distorts the factual realities of the case and does not accurately represent defendant's personal culpability such that it shocks the moral sense of the community. This moral sense is particularly true, as in the case before us, where a 15-year-old with one minute to contemplate his decision to participate in the incident and stood as a lookout during the shooting, but never handled a gun, is subject to life imprisonment with no possibility of parole-the same sentence applicable to the actual shooter.

Or, as the trial court judge put it:

I believe he was proved guilty beyond a reasonable doubt, and I believe he should suffer harsh criminal consequences for acting as a look-out in this case, but to suggest that he ought to receive a sentence of life without the possibility of parole, I find to be very, very hard to swallow to the point where I can describe it as unconscionable. I am concerned that a person under the age of 18 under Illinois law can do everything that John Gacy did, can torture and abuse and murder over 30 people, and would be in the same boat as [defendant] right now looking at a sentence of a minimum and maximum of life without the possibility of parole.

I have a 15-year-old child who was passively acting as a look-out for other people, never picked up a gun, never had much more than-perhaps less than a minute-to contemplate what this entire incident is about, and he is in the same situation as a serial killer for sentencing purposes.

You can access the full opinion here. Again, congratulations to the Clinic (of which I am an alum, though not of this project) and all those who worked on this case for this victory. Under the leadership of Professors Randolph Stone and Herschella Conyers, the Criminal and Juvenile Justice Project has shown an extraordinary commitment to children accused of brutal crimes, often taking on some of the worst, most unpopular cases you can imagine, and do extraordinary legal work on behalf of their clients.

In my two-plus years of clinical work under Professor Gary Palm, I learned an extraordinary amount about the actual nuts-and-bolts practice of law and the right way to represent clients vigorously, much more than could ever be gained in the classroom. For more on the Clinic, keep reading here. (My project, the former Anti-Poverty Project, is noted on page three. (Initial link courtesy How Appealing.)