ANOTHER REASON TO BOYCOTT THE EVIL EMPIRE: Am I the only one being driven crazy by the MSNdirect billboards? The one where you see the MSNdirect watch (terrible idea, by the way) on the wrist while the hand is holding various things (e.g. an ice cream cone)? If you are holding an ice cream cone, the watch should be upside down. This really irritates me.

BY THE TIME WE GOT TO ARIZONA, MANNING AND GALLERY WERE GONE: Did I hear Chuck D doing the theme for this weekend's NFL Draft?

'TIS NO MAN. 'TIS A REMORSELESS EATING MACHINE: Note to readers in the Salt Lake City aea: the all-you-can-eat buffet at the Chuck-A-Rama in Taylorsville is not, in fact, all-you-can-eat as carb-hater Sui Amaama learned this week when returning for an extra slice of roast beef:

"It's so embarrassing actually," said Isabelle Leota, Amaama's wife. "We went in to have dinner, we were under the impression Chuck-A-Rama was an all-you-can-eat establishment."

Not so, said Jack Johanson, the restaurant chain's district manager.

"We've never claimed to be an all-you-can-eat establishment," said Johanson. "Our understanding is a buffet is just a style of eating."

Trivia note: the writer of the Simpsons episode in question? Conan O'Brien.

HERO TO MOST: Variety is reporting today that NYT film critic A.O. Scott, a book critic just a few years ago (and whose audition for the NYT job mostly consisted of this Scorsese essay on Slate.com), is about to be named the Times' first Chief Movie Critic since Janet Maslin.

I've got no quarrel with Tony, but the cumulative fallout is devastating: apparently, our hero, Elvis Mitchell, is leaving the building as a result.

No one references quite like him, and a wise newspaper would snatch him up swiftly.

MA MA SE, MA MA SA, MA MA COO SA: Does Michael Jackson want to be finishing something -- namely, his life? Our good friend Andy Lloyd thinks the stress of the investigation is too high to get over, and too low to get under, and he sees a lot of Vicodin in Jacko's future. A lot.

PANIC ON THE STREETS OF WESTWOOD: You'll be relieved to know that the Department of Homeland Security has determined that former Smiths' frontman Morrissey is not a terrorist.

Could life ever be sane again? And what is the Grasmere, anyway?

THE 'C' WORD: While I blamed the voters for this week's AI3 voting fiasco, the WaPo's Lisa de Moraes reports that others are accusing Fox/19E of a racial conspiracy.

I'll stick with my original story.