MMMMMM . . . . SALTED PORK: Okay, we've only seen about half of the first episode, but Jen and I are getting hooked on PBS's new reality series (yes, you read that right) Colonial House.

Imagine the Real World, plus Survivor-level deprivation, plus -- and I know you're not used to this on reality tv -- educational content. Seventeen well-trained people sent to middle-of-nowhere Maine, where they're going to try to replicate 1600s American society, from gender roles to colonial hierarchies (the servants, they are quite indentured) to the provisions available to having to deal with local Passamaquoddy tribe.

From what I can gather, there's four 2-hour episodes, two of which debuted last week, two which debut this week, repeated frequently. Check your local listings, enjoy, and, prithee, get your learning on.

MMMMMM...CHOCOLATE SYRUP AND CASABA MELON: Janet Leigh's death in the shower in "Psycho" (which was so viscerally created using the previously mentioned foodstuffs) has been named the best film death of all time by the British magazine Total Film. The entire list isn't available, but rounding out the top five are: 2. Slim Pickens riding the bomb in "Dr Strangelove"; 3. King Kong taking a great fall in "King Kong"; 4. Alan Rickman plunging to the pavement in "Die Hard"; and 5. Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway being riddled with bullets in "Bonnie and Clyde." Also on the list are the deaths of Bambi's Mom, the Wicked Witch of the West, John Hurt having the ultimate upset stomach in "Alien," the corny death in "Witness," and scenes from "The Omen," "The Godfather," and "Reservoir Dogs."

So what is your favorite overlooked movie death scene? The first one that comes to mind for me is Wallace Shawn in "The Princess Bride." Let's hear from you in the comments.

THIS IS IT: The television reunion show we've all been waiting for has finally been announced! Coming next season to CBS, Ms. Romano, Schneider, Julie and Barbara reunite and reminisce about nine (nine?!?) wonderful seasons of taking things "One Day at a Time".

DISASTER AVERTED: It's Fantasia and Diana in the finals.

Just like in Survivor, up until the finals, it's not about being the best each week; it's about not being the worst. Now, assuming a fair vote, it's up to someone to win it.

Assuming an unfair vote, however, because it's Fox/19E, I'll tentatively predict a Diana win, because I think 19E sees Fantasia as being marketable with or without the crown, but that Diana's career prospects would be significantly enhanced with the AI title. You?

BETTER LATE . . . : It may have taken him until the age of 45, but Tom Arnold has finally said something funny:

Could a 30-second film role have saved Kobe Bryant from his rape trial in Colorado? Tom Arnold seems to think so after making his new movie, "Soul Plane," which also stars Snoop Dogg.

He says Bryant was originally offered a cameo that later went to fellow Laker Karl Malone.

Arnold told us, "[Kobe] was considering it, but he called back and said 'I have to be in Colorado that day to get a little bit of surgery.' I swear to God. It is the only time in history that someone could say 'Damn, if I had only been with Snoop Dogg last night, I wouldn't have gotten in trouble.'"

Arnold's next good joke is due in 2049.

YES, BUT WILL THEY BRING BACK TEAM GUIDO? If CBS only promised an Amazing Race 5 for Tuesday nights this summer, it would have been enough for us.

But today comes confirmation that The Amazing Race 6 will follow right afterwards, airing Saturday nights this fall at 9pm on CBS. Wow.

Seriously, dayenu.

LET NO ONE ELSE'S WORK EVADE YOUR EYES: From McSweeney's Internet Tendency, April 28: Create Your Own Thomas Friedman Op-Ed Column: Disorder and Dreams in [Country In The News], by Michael Ward.

From the NY Observer, May 19: Write your own Thomas Friedman column!, by Michael Kubin.

Just saying. Is all. (And Ward's is funnier.)

edited to add: Okay, time for a moment of irony: Low Culture posted this first, but I didn't see their post until after I posted mine.