NOT THAT I DON'T LOVE 'LIVERPUDLIAN', 'MANCUNIAN' OR 'MICHIGANDER': As the world awaits the ascension of five-time Olympic bobsleigher Albert Grimaldi (Amherst '81) to his father's throne, one question rises above all others:
Is there a cooler adjectival form of a place than Monégasque?
Look: "Oxonian" is cool. I even like "Québécois". But there's no beating the adjectival form for the good people of Monaco, is there?
Saturday, April 2, 2005
JUST AS LONG AS I GET CHONE FIGGINS: If anyone is interested in joining me in an ESPN rotisserie league livedrafting Tuesday night at 7p eastern (ML, 5x5, roto), please email me at throwingthingsblog at hotmail.com and I can forward the details.
ROSA PARKS OF THE GOLDEN ARCHES: Via loyal reader db, we learn this morning that the immortal Hyde Park McDonalds has found itself in the news again (or, if you don't have a Trib pw, here too:
As a lawprof notes, however, the McDonald's may have been entirely in the constitutional clear on this one. Thoughts?
The owner of a McDonald's restaurant in the Hyde Park neighborhood scrapped a policy Thursday that required Kenwood Academy High School students to sit in a separate area from other customers, after a student protesting the policy was handcuffed by Chicago police and taken back to campus.
Catherine Smith, 15, was two bites into her Chicken Selects Wednesday when a security guard ordered her and her friends to move because they were sitting in a "non-student" area, she said.
"I paid for the food just like everyone else and I'm not leaving," Smith responded.
The security guard then called Chicago police. Undercover officers approached Smith and said she was trespassing and resisting arrest. They handcuffed the honor student, led her out of the popular student hangout, placed her in a squad car and took her back to campus, Smith said.
As a lawprof notes, however, the McDonald's may have been entirely in the constitutional clear on this one. Thoughts?
Friday, April 1, 2005
SHAMELESS BOOK PLUG FOR THE WEEK: OK, I'm not normally one who's much for audiobooks, much less audiobooks bought at the same time I buy the hardcover, but I can't resist this one. Not only do you get the new book from "This American Life" contributor and regular Conan guest Sarah Vowell, who's a writer with a great voice both in the speaking sense and in how she writes. Even reading one of her books, you can hear her characteristic voice speaking. That would be awesome enough, but what makes the audiobook absolutely worth the purchase is the guest readers--Vowell narrates, but Conan O'Brien, Jon Stewart (as President James Garfield), Daniel "Lemony Snicket" Handler, Catherine Keener, and Brad "Edna Mode" Bird make appearances, and the audiobook features an original score by Michael Giacchino, who's inexplicably never even been nominated for an Emmy or an Oscar. Sure, it's marred by the presence of Stephen King (as Abraham Lincoln) and Dave Eggers, who both fall into the category of "not nearly as entertaining and funny as they think they are," but how can you nor love a book that includes "mummies, show tunes, mean-spirited totem poles, and a nineteenth century biblical sex cult?
TM5MLA PRESENTS AN ALOTT5MA POST OF ISAAC SPACEMAN'S POSTCARD FROM THE GREAT MAGNETIC FIELD: As part of the dissolution, TM5MLA (distribution) and ALOTT5MA (content) jointly present the following cross-post, Isaac's biannual rant about the greatest cultural crime in American history: the failure to put Black Sabbath in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Here's the scorecard, and I will brook no dissent:
1. Black Sabbath invented alternative rock. Sure, we might have gotten there through punk, but we didn't. Without Black Sabbath, there would be no Nirvana (via no Melvins), no Black Flag, no Pearl Jam, no Bush, no Creed, no Smashing Pumpkins, to name a few. Sure, some of that would be a good thing, but we didn't keep Simon and Garfunkel out just because of the Indigo Girls, did we? And for fans of the MC-5 who want to claim paternity for modern rock: please go back to bed.
2. Black Sabbath made protest rock accessible to non-hippies. Let me get this straight. Dylan's "Masters of War" is a trenchant commentary. Sabbath's "War Pigs" is a comic book fantasy? Listen to the two songs -- similar structure, lyrically and musically, except that War Pigs has the elegiac coda with the chilling crescendo finish, and of course is better done. Also, not that this is the only important thing, it's far more enduring and popular among everybody but critics. And I haven't even brought up Sabbath's other protest/issue songs -- Children of the Grave, Snowblind, Hand of Doom, etc.
3. Black Sabbath pioneered the heavy-metal ballad. "Laguna Sunrise" and "Changes," both on 1972's Volume 4, basically invented the sub-genre. "Laguna Sunrise" is a beautiful and simple acoustic guitar duet. "Changes" is a mopey breakup song. Both played completely against type, making it okay for tough guys to cry on future vinyl. No Sabbath, no "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." What would you do without "Every Rose Has Its Thorn"?
4. Black Sabbath invented cartoon devil-worship. Before Sabbath, you might get tarred and feathered just for saying something like "that Satan fellow, well, in my book he's okay." After Sabbath it was okay to go on the Muppet Show and make a deal for Miss Piggy's soul. No, it's not an urban legend. You may not like this, but you cannot deny the important cultural role that cartoon devil worship acceptance has played in our society.
5. Black Sabbath invented smokers' wing style. Remember when you were in high school and those guys used to hang out in the parking lot with puffy hair and mustaches and leather jackets with the sleeves pushed up to their forearms? Black Sabbath's Tony Iommi and Geezer Butler invented that. As far as I know, there are still guys standing in the parking lots today with that same look. It spread rapidly -- to John Oates, to Bucky Dharma, to Weird Al Yankovic. By the mid-80s you couldn't swing a cat at an AOR promotional convention without hitting a DJ sporting that style. That has to count for something.
6. Even when off its peak, Black Sabbath was great. When bands fire their original singers, they tend to get terrible quickly. Sammy Hagar sucked the fun out of Van Halen, and don't get me started on Gary Cherone. Joe Lynn Turner ruined Richie Blackmore's Rainbow. Not Sabbath. After Ozzy went solo, they picked up huge-voice/tiny man (inside and out) Ronnie James Dio for two really good albums (Heaven and Hell and Mob Rules) and a passable live album (Live Evil). When Dio was too much of a jerk to deal with, they signed up former Deep Purple frontman Ian Gillan, who was, surprisingly, amazing. This trio is like the heavy-metal equivalent of the Three Tenors. The only other exceptions to the don't-replace-your-vocalist rule, as far as I can tell, are Iron Maiden and Squeeze.
TM5MLA retains the right to sequelize this cross-post without the participation of the original creative team.
1. Black Sabbath invented alternative rock. Sure, we might have gotten there through punk, but we didn't. Without Black Sabbath, there would be no Nirvana (via no Melvins), no Black Flag, no Pearl Jam, no Bush, no Creed, no Smashing Pumpkins, to name a few. Sure, some of that would be a good thing, but we didn't keep Simon and Garfunkel out just because of the Indigo Girls, did we? And for fans of the MC-5 who want to claim paternity for modern rock: please go back to bed.
2. Black Sabbath made protest rock accessible to non-hippies. Let me get this straight. Dylan's "Masters of War" is a trenchant commentary. Sabbath's "War Pigs" is a comic book fantasy? Listen to the two songs -- similar structure, lyrically and musically, except that War Pigs has the elegiac coda with the chilling crescendo finish, and of course is better done. Also, not that this is the only important thing, it's far more enduring and popular among everybody but critics. And I haven't even brought up Sabbath's other protest/issue songs -- Children of the Grave, Snowblind, Hand of Doom, etc.
3. Black Sabbath pioneered the heavy-metal ballad. "Laguna Sunrise" and "Changes," both on 1972's Volume 4, basically invented the sub-genre. "Laguna Sunrise" is a beautiful and simple acoustic guitar duet. "Changes" is a mopey breakup song. Both played completely against type, making it okay for tough guys to cry on future vinyl. No Sabbath, no "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." What would you do without "Every Rose Has Its Thorn"?
4. Black Sabbath invented cartoon devil-worship. Before Sabbath, you might get tarred and feathered just for saying something like "that Satan fellow, well, in my book he's okay." After Sabbath it was okay to go on the Muppet Show and make a deal for Miss Piggy's soul. No, it's not an urban legend. You may not like this, but you cannot deny the important cultural role that cartoon devil worship acceptance has played in our society.
5. Black Sabbath invented smokers' wing style. Remember when you were in high school and those guys used to hang out in the parking lot with puffy hair and mustaches and leather jackets with the sleeves pushed up to their forearms? Black Sabbath's Tony Iommi and Geezer Butler invented that. As far as I know, there are still guys standing in the parking lots today with that same look. It spread rapidly -- to John Oates, to Bucky Dharma, to Weird Al Yankovic. By the mid-80s you couldn't swing a cat at an AOR promotional convention without hitting a DJ sporting that style. That has to count for something.
6. Even when off its peak, Black Sabbath was great. When bands fire their original singers, they tend to get terrible quickly. Sammy Hagar sucked the fun out of Van Halen, and don't get me started on Gary Cherone. Joe Lynn Turner ruined Richie Blackmore's Rainbow. Not Sabbath. After Ozzy went solo, they picked up huge-voice/tiny man (inside and out) Ronnie James Dio for two really good albums (Heaven and Hell and Mob Rules) and a passable live album (Live Evil). When Dio was too much of a jerk to deal with, they signed up former Deep Purple frontman Ian Gillan, who was, surprisingly, amazing. This trio is like the heavy-metal equivalent of the Three Tenors. The only other exceptions to the don't-replace-your-vocalist rule, as far as I can tell, are Iron Maiden and Squeeze.
TM5MLA retains the right to sequelize this cross-post without the participation of the original creative team.
ALL GOOD THINGS: We recognize that the past several hours have been especially challenging and we are extremely grateful for your patience, understanding and continuing contributions to ALOTT5MA’s success. We understand that the speculation about the blog’s future has created uncertainty for each of you and we truly appreciate your ongoing professionalism and performance.
I must reluctantly report that ALOTT5MA, L^3 and The Yin Blog have reached a mutual agreement terminating our joint venture. (Prof. Althouse departed separately and preemptively. Her lawyers are good.)
Under the agreement, the parties will remain co-chairs of Tung's Minutes of Five More Libidinal Althouses on a non-exclusive basis through the end of April 1, 2005. During this period, we will focus our efforts on completing posts currently in production.
ALOTT5MA has agreed to surrender all naming rights and claims to the intellectual property of the joint venture, as well as its right to release movies under the name "Miramax Films". We retain the right to collaborate with Scott and Tung on future products, including, but not limited to, making fun of sequels to hit film franchises like Scary Movie and Spy Kids.
We are incredibly grateful for the chances we havebeen given at Tung's Minutes of Five More Libidinal Althouses over the past day. As bloggers, we truly appreciate the unique opportunities we have had to work with some of the greatest talent, both on the internet and off, and we look forward to further collaborations on groundbreaking projects.
I must reluctantly report that ALOTT5MA, L^3 and The Yin Blog have reached a mutual agreement terminating our joint venture. (Prof. Althouse departed separately and preemptively. Her lawyers are good.)
Under the agreement, the parties will remain co-chairs of Tung's Minutes of Five More Libidinal Althouses on a non-exclusive basis through the end of April 1, 2005. During this period, we will focus our efforts on completing posts currently in production.
ALOTT5MA has agreed to surrender all naming rights and claims to the intellectual property of the joint venture, as well as its right to release movies under the name "Miramax Films". We retain the right to collaborate with Scott and Tung on future products, including, but not limited to, making fun of sequels to hit film franchises like Scary Movie and Spy Kids.
We are incredibly grateful for the chances we havebeen given at Tung's Minutes of Five More Libidinal Althouses over the past day. As bloggers, we truly appreciate the unique opportunities we have had to work with some of the greatest talent, both on the internet and off, and we look forward to further collaborations on groundbreaking projects.
HE'S A PITCHER, PART YOGI AND PART RECLUSE, IMPRESSIVELY LIBERATED FROM OUR OPULENT LIFE-STYLE: On this august day when so much has changed (or has it?) (seriously, make sure you check out Isaac's piece at some point), longtime ALOTT5MA favorite Mets prospect Sidd Finch showed up in the New York Times today, twenty years to the day after he first captured our imagination.
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