NOTHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO BUT DANCE: Am I the only one who's more than a bit shocked that the Number One movie in America this weekend is going to be the apparently dancetastic Step Up?

STILL NOT A DUMP TRUCK: Tron Guy and that guy who dresses like Peter Pan have (quite amusingly) joined the crusade for Net Neutrality with "We Are The Web." This could be the biggest charity record since Rockers To Help Explain Whitewater.

BACK, AND TO THE LEFT: Today's an appropriate day to talk about the career of Oliver Stone, with this collection of Ebert reviews as a starting point.

While recognizing that there are severe problems with Stone as a historian, I am a definite fan of him as director/provocateur. As with Coppola, I am a big fan of directors with ambition and operatic reach. Say what you will about JFK and Natural Born Killers in terms of plot, accuracy and coherence, but in terms of fully employing the director's toolkit to make an impact, there are few like Stone.

Which is not to say that I'm that interested in World Trade Center -- I'm more likely to rent United 93, which I regret missing. But that's me.

YET ANOTHER OPTION FOR SEN. LIEBERMAN? Well, if Tucker Carlson is going to be on Dancing With The Stars, I don't see why we can't cast the entire show with wonky political figures, though I'm not sure how well So You Think The Director of the Office Of Management And Budget Can Dance would do in the ratings. I'm still waiting for Hannity and Colmes to turn into breakdance fighting.

I AM, I AM, I AM SUPERMAN: As TPE has previously observed, Sci-Fi's "Who Wants to Be A Superhero?" is astoundingly fun. Sure, I'm not a huge fan of some of the "Fear Factor"-esque challenges (walking on a balance beam across a high chasm, making the way across a yard with a pair of attack dogs), and either this is the best edited reality show ever or it's highly scripted. Sure, the special effects are incredibly cheesy, but that's all part of the charm. I think my favorites are Monkey Woman, for her sheer tenacity, fighting off attack dogs for nine minutes, and Major Victory, who looks like a classical superhero, even with the cheesy catchphrase--"Be a winner, not a weiner!" (prounced like the sausage, not the name). While I prefer my cheesesteaks with provolone, sometimes, you want the TV equivalent of Cheez Whiz, and this delivers that in spades.

HEY 33, THAT'S 'RETHA FRANKLIN. SHE DON'T REMEMBER THE QUEEN OF SHRIEKING AS LOUD AS SHE CAN WITH NO APPARENT RESPECT FOR THE SONG ITSELF: Oh, am I giving away my Rock Star: Supernova bias here? Anyway, hard to argue with the elimination this week. One comment and one question, though. First, after the way Metallica famously treated Newsted after he replaced Cliff Burton, and after they made Dave Mustaine, in a similar position, cry on-camera in Some Kind of Monster, I never thought anything would make me take James Hetfield's side. That said, Newsted's showy ponderousness is getting me pretty close. Like Jay Bennett in I Am Trying to Break Your Heart, he's the classic Exasperatingly Fragile Bandmate. If you've been in a band, you know (or are) this guy. And he wears fingerless wool gloves in Los Angeles in August. How can he be in a band with party monsters Lee and Clarke?

Second, why do Tommy Lee's shirts have buttons?

BLAME IT ON THE RAIN, YEAH, YEAH: One of my occaisional forays into Wikipedia revealed an interesting topic for discussion--who is the most embarassing ever Grammy Winner for Best New Artist? (Milli Vanilli, which had its Grammy stripped from it, is, of course, disqualified.) Sure, you can ask "Wow, whatever happened to Shelby Lynne?," but the out and out embarassments come in the 60s, which featured winners Robert Goulet, The Swingle Singers, Tom Jones, Bobbie Gentry, and Jose Feliciano. Of course, the 1963 Grammys may be the most bizarre ever, with Vaughn Meader winning the big award.

Conversely, who's the best choice the Grammy folks have made based on longevity, etc.? 1970 (Crosby Stills & Nash), 1972 (Carly Simon), 1974 (Bette Midler), 1991 (Mariah Carey), and 1995 (Sheryl Crow) would probably lead the list (assuming you exclude the Beatles, who won in 1965).