I HAD THE MOST ABSURD NIGHTMARE: A reader passed along this photo from Cannot Unsee showing that Tyler Durden (Fight Club) and Louis Winthorpe III (Trading Places) wear the same coat, suggesting to the poster that the Ed Norton character in Fight Club had the other film imprinted in his brain in conjuring Durden.

It led me in a different direction.  Okay, remember back in May when we discussed the Tyler Durden theory for Ferris Bueller's Day Off?  Same question here: is it possible that Billy Ray Valentine doesn't exist, but that a PCP-addicted Winthorpe conjured him in his head, upon his firing from Duke & Duke, as a means of motivating himself to clean up and rebuild his career?  I'm still working through the details, but it's not a wholly implausible theory, is it?

ACTIVATE THE OMEGA-13 DEVICE: Right before Galaxy Quest was released, E! aired a 30 minute "documentary" about the Galaxy Quest "TV series," with Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Alan Rickman, and Darryl Mitchell all talking about the "show" in character. While you'd think it'd be a bonus feature on a DVD, it wasn't. However, someone's been nice enough to upload it on YouTube, and IO9 has pointed us all to it. Well worth your time, and still the best thing Tim Allen has ever done (or probably will ever do).

JERRY SCREWED IT UP AGAIN: Don't get me wrong--I love me some Parks & Recreation, and I agree that the show is at its best when Leslie is shown as being good at her job, but haven't the past four episodes (while all being very funny) all followed the same arc of "oh, no! Parks dpeartment in peril! What will we do?" and then Leslie coming up with a saving idea at the last minute which solves the problem. Admittedly, the execution of each of those plots has been funny, and the b-plots (Ron hires Andy as an assistant to ensure continued incompetence in the position, Ron coaches basketball, Rob Lowe exhorts his body to behave) have been comic gold, but Leslie can't always be dea ex Parks Department. (Feel free to use this to discuss the rest of Comedy Night Done Right, At Least Until Outsourced Comes On At 10:30--I suspect folks may have things to say about last night's Community in particular.)

FRIDAY ALOTT5MA GRAMMAR RODEO:  Paul asked us to address this question, and I will do with caution. The answer, however, is clear.

To say that something "begs the question" mean that it assumes its own premise without proof.  The alt.usage.english FAQ suggests "Telepathy cannot exist because direct transfer of thought between individuals is impossible" as an example; the late Bill "Whoppers Junior" Safire suggested in 1998 "Lying is wrong because you shouldn't say things that aren't true." as well.

It does not mean "to raise the question." That's something else. More Safire:

Let's say you argue: “Common usage makes it correct because that's the way most people talk.” I say that begs the question because “the way most people talk” is the definition of “common usage.” You could logically argue that “common usage makes it correct because language is changing constantly” or that “common usage makes it correct because rigid prescriptivists have been shown to be the laughingstocks of linguistics,” but you cannot argue in a straight line that “common usage is correct because it's common usage.”

Dictionaries have long reported that to beg no longer means only “to ask for a handout” or “to entreat humbly,” as in “I beg to differ.” It also means -- especially in the phrases to beg the question or to beg the point -- “to take for granted, to assume without logical proof.” And beyond that, “to avoid the issue; to sidestep the argument.” (Sentence fragments are O.K. when used for stylistic emphasis.)

“I wonder,” wonders Ms Meyers, not begging but asking, “has such frequent misuse of the technical term to beg the question made it somehow a proper use of the phrase? Or does such usage remain mistaken?”

Stay on those ramparts, logical thinkers -- hold the fort for Aristotle, the English language and St. George! To use to beg the question as a synonym for “to call for the question” is a mistake. Why? It's a mistake because it is in error. (That's begging the question.)

Got it?  Good.  Because we have screwed this up many times.

poll results, 2/11: I knew what it meant: 46 (58%); I'm ashamed I was so wrong: 15 (19%); and Means the same as "raises the question": 17 (21%).

SIXTH ANNUAL SEASON-ENDING BIG GAME POOL: Five questions, one blog:

1. Winner/final score.
2. Official Game MVP.
3. Since Anheuser-Busch has lost the past two years after its previous decade of dominance, we can again ask: which Super Bowl advertiser tops the USA Today Super Bowl Ad Meter?
4. Predict the Black Eyed Peas's setlist. (Bonus points for anything else you successfully predict about the halftime show, whether it's a JabbaWockeeZ appearance or accidental micturation.)
5. Will Christina Aguilera's rendition of the National Anthem be longer or shorter than 1:52?
Tiebreaker: Pick a prop bet as listed on Football Outsiders.  Get it right.  The tougher the odds of winning your bet, the more credit you get.

Previous winners: 2006: Benner; 2007: me; 2008: Joseph J. Finn ; 2009: Scott and 2010: Scott again. As they will tell you, the prizes are Fame and Glory within this community, but nothing financial.

[My predictions: Packers 34-20; Rodgers; old reliable Anheuser-Busch; I Gotta Feeling/(the one with the Dirty Dancing sample)/Boom Boom Pow/Where's The Love?; shorter; Yes on Tramon Williams INT, +300.]

NO, BEAVIS, NOT "HIGH" "COOL": HAIKU, THE HAUNTING THREE LINE FORM OF JAPANESE POETRY: For some reason, Mike Judge is bringing Beavis and Butthead back to MTV with new episodes. I don't know if he burned through his King of the Hill money or he has a new message. Like the Mystery of the Morning Wood, we will probably never know why, exactly.

USE OF FORCE: Videos of streetfights have gone too far. (NSFW for language alone. HT: @cinematical)