LE QUARTIER ANACOSTIA N’EST PAS RECOMMANDABLE DE JOUR COMME DE NUIT:  Are you traveling to the United States? Are you French?  Your government has some advice for you.  (HT: WaPo.)

NOT OKAY, LESS THAN AWESOME: Spurred by the high ratings HIMYM has continued to get and the issues it's had with newer comedies on Monday, CBS has officially ordered a pilot of How I Met Your Dad, which will focus on another group of friends who hang out at McLaren's, with an entirely new cast.  (No, this won't be a "flip side" story of the show led by Miliotti.)  Seems like a safe bet that it'll be leading off CBS Mondays next fall.  (That said, during pilot season last year, Beverly Hills Cop and NCIS: Red sure sounded like slamdunks.)

THEY WILL HAVE THE ABILITY TO APPEAL ANY VERDICT, BUT GOOD LUCK WITH THAT:  The work of SFBatKid Miles has resulted in an indictment being filed in United States v. Edward Nigma and Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot. Indeed, there was heroism all over the Bay Area today, and if this results in other cities engaging in copycat efforts to enrich the lives of deserving children in their midst, I think that would be fantastic.

JUST KEEP THE CYANIDE AWAY:  It may sound like one of those #slatepitches, but actually it's The Atlantic arguing that you can totally eat an apple's core, especially if you eat it vertically.

MOTHER, MAY I SLEEP WITH (REDACTED FOR SPOILERS): Speaking of trailers, Lifetime has released a trailer for its upcoming remake of Flowers In The Attic, including a creepy "Sweet Child O'Mine" cover and Heather Graham doing high camp.

WHAT'S A CUBIT?  First trailer for Darren Aronofsky's Noah, with Russell Crowe in the title role, Sir Anthony Hopkins as grandpa Methuselah, and a whole lot of water in the third act.

...BUT IT DIDN'T KNOW YOU THEN:  Mazel tov to our friend Paul Tabachneck, who is no longer single because he released a single, having successfully proposed to his girlfriend last week employing this here music video for a new song he created for the occasion.