Sunday, February 14, 2010
FINALLY ALL THOSE EROTIC DREAMS I HAVE HAD INVOLVING FRANKLIN PIERCE CAN BE EXPLAINED: In honor of the day we honor all our commanders in chief by appropriating their images to shill for cars and bargain furniture, Nerve has ranked all 43 U.S. presidents in order of sexiness from Nixon to Teddy Roosevelt, who surprisingly finishes just ahead of JFK and Obama for the top spot.
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JFK ahead of LBJ? He who said "I've had more women by accident than he's had on purpose?" Similarly, Presidential casanovas Harding, Cleveland, and Arthur are way too low; and Ford and Jackson should be higher, as sexy Presidential non-casanovas.
ReplyDeleteI've always found Ulysses S. Grant rather attractive. I like the Matthew Brady photos of him from the war, with his uniform and his beard and all.
ReplyDeleteMan, what is WRONG with me?
There is no surprise with TR. Having grown up only a few miles from his Sagamore Hill, I was crushin' on him since I was 8. Not only was he athletic and outdoorsy, he was also intellectual and confident. And had an impressive sense of humor. I even did my college senior thesis on him. And oh yeah, he had fantastic taste in real estate. Thanks for making me realize on Valentine's Day that TR sent the bar really really high. Explains everything.
ReplyDeleteWould women grab onto Old Kinderhook's muttonchops during sex? Also, I think Nixon's in that zone that Tyra would call pretty-ugly; if he were on Top Model, he'd at least make it as far as the go-see challenge when they travel abroad.
ReplyDeleteI was going to argue that Buchanan should have been last, but I have to admit that the picture they've got there is slightly better than the one you usually see of him.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to learn that new tidbit about Nancy Reagan.
ReplyDeleteNixon's last, in part because of his 'virulent racism' and Hayes is also ranked low because he 'botched Reconstruction.' By that standard, Andrew Johnson shouldn't even get to play.
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