Thursday, February 18, 2010

STEALING BLATANTLY FROM HARPER'S: A selected list of Facebook groups in the "Can this (allegedly humorous item) get more fans than (something/someone I dislike)" vein (I have excluded the large subset of expressly political ones), now updated with membership numbers for each group:
  • Can this pickle get more fans than Nickelback? (Pickle--1,383,495 fans, Nickelback--1,411,454 fans)
  • Can this sausage roll get more fans than Cheryl Cole? (Sausage Roll--1,076,000 fans, Cheryl Cole--1,533,115 fans)
  • Can this pickle get more fans than Twilight? (Pickle--552,278 fans, Twilight--5,033,473 fans)
  • Can this guy who looks like a THUMB get more fans than Miley Cyrus? (Guy who looks like a THUMB--130,723 fans, Miley--2,017,481 fans)
  • Can this hobo get more fans than the Jonas Brothers? (Hobo--60,333 fans, Jonas Brothers--2,103,953 fans)
  • Can this teapot get more fans than Zac Efron? (Teapot--9,532 fans, Zac Efron--140,314 fans)
  • Can this outhouse get more fans than the Texas Longhorns? (Outhouse--8,614 fans, Texas Longhorns--206,335 fans)
  • Can this stapler get more fans than Justin Bieber? (Stapler--6,009 fans, Bieber--1,762,699 fans)
  • Can this Slayer song get more fans than the Bible? (Slayer Song--3,052 fans, The Bible--1,642,783 fans as "religious organization," 750,399 fans as "consumer product")
  • Can this M&M get more fans than Eminem? (M&M--1,486 fans, Eminem--2,630,151 fans)
  • Can this chicken nugget get more fans than Lady Gaga? (chicken nugget--1,398 fans, Gaga--5,282,907 fans)
(Seriously, all of these are real.)
Posted by Matt at 10:46 AM

22 comments:

  1. Joseph J. Finn10:58 AM

    I fully support the last one and have joined it.  Just because I'm a crank.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jeff11:28 AM

    This is one of the things that drives me crazy about Facebook Fan Pages. The way that it's worded, you shouldn't be able to become a fan of "I Love Cheese." You should need to become a fan of cheese instead. So you should create a fan page for "Pickles" and find another way to promote the fact that you're trying to get more fans than whatever it is you dislike.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Matt11:46 AM

    Well, theoretically, one could be a fan both of cheese and of chessephilia, and both a fan of a pickle and the concept of that pickle obtaining more fans than Nickelback.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Nancy11:47 AM

    I am a proud Pickle fan. I am also a fan of "Can this xcat wearing a tin foil hat get more fans than Glenn Beck?"

    ReplyDelete
  5. Adam12:06 PM

    Go Pickle!

    ReplyDelete
  6. spacewoman12:10 PM

    I just need to share the fact that my crazy middle-aged cousin who has been bombarding me with requests ever since she joined fb (and well over a year ago, so she's long past the time when that inital burst of joiner enthusiasm should have passed) had her fb privileges suspended.  i'm a fan of that.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Andrew12:25 PM

    I agree with Jeff as far as being a fan of any class of objects (e.g. Cheese, of which I am indeed a fan). But this particular phenomenon is about approving of the idea of a specific pickle having more fans than Nickelback (to prove the idea that more people dislike Nickelback than actually like them.) 

    ReplyDelete
  8. bella wilfer12:51 PM

    The Pickle v Nickelback saga has dominated my news feed for days. 

    Way more importantly - spacewoman, how did your cousin get her privileges suspended?? I didn't know that was possible! What was she posting???

    ReplyDelete
  9. Genevieve12:51 PM

    I haven't joined any of these, but I probably need to join the pickle/Nickelback one.  Just because every time a song comes on the radio that I dislike, and I ask my husband "who sings this?", the answer is Nickelback.

    ReplyDelete
  10. MidwestAndrew1:14 PM

    I fully support the pickle. Nickleback is auditory diarrhea.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Jeff1:26 PM

    Matt, I agree, but that's not how it's labeled. I'd become a fan of "Things that Aren't Nickleback" or "The Effort to Prove that this Pickle Can Get More Fans than Nickleback," but the sentence "Jeff became a fan of 'Can this pickle get more fans than Nickleback?' doesn't pass my logic test.

    For the record, I hate Nickleback and love pickles. But only dills.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Jeff1:27 PM

    Every time a Nickleback song comes on the radio, there's a race between my brothers and I to say "Nickleback blows" and change the station.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Russ1:38 PM

    I have a cousin like that.  I blocked her from my email account long ago, after tiring of her constant barrage of "jokes," ridiculous conspiracy theories, etc.  She tried friending me recently, and I just haven't accepted.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Russ1:38 PM

    <span>I have a cousin like that.  I blocked her from my email account long ago, after tiring of her constant barrage of "jokes," ridiculous conspiracy theories, etc.  She tried friending me recently, and I just haven't accepted.</span>

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous2:49 PM

    I am both a pickle in regards to both Nickleback and Twilight. And I don't even care for Pickles...

    ReplyDelete
  16. Marsha4:25 PM

    Am I correct that so far, the answer to all of these is "No"?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Matt5:01 PM

    Thus far, yes.  But the pickle is only 20K behind Nickelback.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Russ6:33 PM

    This is how Marsha reminds us of what we really are.

    ReplyDelete
  19. bella wilfer6:56 PM

    Marsha FTW.

    ReplyDelete
  20. spacewoman1:43 PM

    I think my brother actually might have been the one who got her suspended, although we're not sure how; he kept refusing her repeated requests to join some stupid family group.  Major kudos to my brother.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Scott4:38 PM

    Pickle surpassed today.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous12:20 PM

    Go Hobo!!

    ReplyDelete

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