Other things in Cameron Crowe movies you may not want to do in real life:
- Blasting your boombox outside your ex's window
- Dugout sex
- Present a manifesto to one's employer as to how everyone in the firm is behaving unethically
- Hang out with Citizen Dick
- Topeka. House party. LSD.
Demonstrate fellatio in a High School cafeteria.
ReplyDeleteBreak up with your boyfriend by giving him a pen.
ReplyDeleteSell your groupie girlfriend for fifty bucks and a case of beer. (What kind of beer is irrelevant.)
ReplyDeleteGet sex tips from Xavier McDaniel.
ReplyDeleteHire Moe as your business liquidation specialist.
ReplyDelete(I'm pitching this idea to CC for his next movie.)
The X-man has good sex tips.
ReplyDelete<span>Pursuing a career in print journalism.</span>
ReplyDeleteAssume leading role in intergalactic revolution against regime headed by guy who shoots lightning from his frikking fingers.
ReplyDeleteSing original songs about your ex's behavior at a house party, in which the only lyrics are that he lied when he cried.
ReplyDeleteAnnounce to the firm that just fired you how you plan to steal all their clients.
ReplyDeleteHang out at the Gas N Sip on a Saturday night completely alone drinking beers with no women anywhere. By choice.
ReplyDeleteHang out at the Gas 'n' Sip on a Saturday night completely alone drinking beers with no women anywhere.
ReplyDeleteFor that matter, ruling out career choices based on whether they have any connection to things that are sold, bought, or processed,
ReplyDeleteConscious choice.
ReplyDeleteOkay, holy shit. Add to this near simultanaity the fact that I just got back to my office and listened to a voicemail that Professor Jeff left for me earlier in the day, and I think it's time to call it a holiday.
ReplyDeleteTry to sell Kate Hudson as a leading lady.
ReplyDeleteGet hung up on a SuperTrain. People like their cars.
ReplyDeleteIt's the Spirit of the Keymaster, bringing us together at this festive time of year. (But you MUST CHILL.)
ReplyDeleteForget to lock the bathroom door.
ReplyDeleteTrying to buy anything, sell anything, or process anything.
ReplyDeletePut on Side 2 of Physical Graffiti instead of Side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV.
ReplyDeleteConversely, always knock on the bathroom door when someone else might be in there.
ReplyDeleteLet Jeff Spicoli drive.
ReplyDeleteOne could say the onus is on the onanist.
ReplyDeleteI'll just note that seeing the Twitter entry for this was a serious WTF when I have no access at work:
ReplyDelete"<span>New! : JUST ASK THE HERPES MONKEY: Actual press release from the American Veterinary Medical Association (AVMA"</span>
What, what did I do?
ReplyDeleteI LIED!
I LIED!
I LIED!
Let Orlando Bloom design your shoes.
ReplyDeleteAsk how your girlfriend's father is doing when he's incarcerated.
ReplyDelete